Series 1 Episode 8
"Motherhood! What a delight"


Episode 8: Are You Still Talking?


The finale opens with Anne's carriage on the road to Gottingen, Germany. It's autumn 1832 - GJ day 55. In reality it's the end of August 1833, and Anne's on her way to Copenhagen after a busy three weeks in Paris.

Paris

Anne had arrived in Paris on July 25, after a leisurely journey from Calais, stopping off at Chantilly: time to bring her journal up to date, enjoy the fine weather, sight-see and keep up with the news by reading Le Constitutionnel on the way: "passed the barrière de Clichy into Paris without trouble - a douanier merely looked in & civilly asked anything that should pay duty & on my saying no, let the carriage drive on - alighted at the hotel de la Terrasse[1] rue de Rivoli at 2:55 - took the little entresol à droite en entrant 4 pièces & a small anteroom in common with the next apartment - the chef de hôtel asked 100 francs for it but Ι got it for 80/- a week, quite enough - about 11 ½ for a day". Wasting no time to catch up with old friends, Anne hears from a Madame Decante that Mrs Barlow[2] is living nearby. She is sure to hear from Madame Decante that Ι am here" (25-Jul-1833), so "Ι called & sat an hour with Mrs B- all as usual but no kissing or allusion to anything particular all very good friends" (26-Jul-1833); however she soon changes her mind: Mrs B now seems to me almost vulgar to say the least... Ι am determined not to be seen in the streets with her" (27-Jul-1833).

On July 30 Anne (reluctantly) agrees to take Sophie Ferrall - who's in the carriage with Anne in the opening scene of this episode - with her to Copenhagen: "Madame de Bourke[3] - at home - sat with her about an hour - her niece wanting to go to Copenhagen - agreed to take her she, of course, to pay all her own expenses - said Ι was not going there direct - heard all the story of her refusing a Russian with two thousand sterling a year but twenty years older than herself - the young lady twenty-four. Mrs de B determined to get rid of her - Ι promised never to tell all she had told me and she not to say to the girl herself she had told me. When at last Ι rather fought off she said it would be a kindness, a charity, and Ι agreed. How extraordinary, thought Ι. Well Ι am at any rate companioned for" (30-Jul-1833). Anne meets Sophie a few days later: "Madame de Bourke & Mademoiselle Ferrall, a nice pretty looking girl, came at 8 ¼ & staid till 8 ¾ - poor Madame de B- ½ dead with coming upstairs merely to see and thank me for taking the girl. Ι wonder how we shall get on together and whether it is for good or not that Ι shall have her" (2-Aug-1833).

A letter from Ann's sister Elizabeth Sutherland arrives on the 8th: "Mrs S perplexed about her sister - better in bodily health, at least fatter, but still (it seems?) no better in spirits - 'Ι am aware from what my sister has repeatedly stated that there is no individual living by whom she would be so much influenced & my only consolation is that thro' your kind interference & influence she may be directed to do that which will promote her happiness as at present she is certainly unable to judge for herself. Anxiously expecting to hear from you and where Ι can address you with a certainty of my letter reaching you, Ι am, my dear Miss Lister, very sincerely yours' - How extraordinarily things happen!" (8-Aug-1833). This is the letter - along with her reply of the following day "Ι wrote back three pages full of sound advice" - that Anne describes in her letter to Aunt Anne in this episode. The letter from Scotland brings back memories of everything she had tried to leave behind: "Incurred a cross just before getting up thinking of Miss Walker" (9-Aug-1833).

Anne suddenly gets a visit from her cousin[4] on the 17th: "Mr John Lister came at 11:10 for about ½ hour - advised his not[?] thinking of trying for the infirmary at Swansea & settling there as surgeon & apothecary - no graduating without it afterwards & a Glasgow diploma worth nothing - better toil on - make a sacrifice to graduate at Edinburgh - keep in sight of the friends he had made in the company's service, & hope & try for something by & by - did not attempt to shake hands - he is perhaps improved. Told him the great thing was to get gradually into better and[sic] society and have the manners of a gentleman. Said Ι was interested in his doing well - would be glad but could not help him in a pecuniary way - had my sister and my own immediate family - meaning my aunt. He hoped Ι did not think he thought of such a thing. 'Oh no,' said I, not on terms with his father's family - had not seen any of them for long".

Later the same day Anne goes to say goodbye to Mrs Barlow: "came in at 9 ¼ - from then to 10:25 with Mrs & Miss Barlow - she asked about burning my letters - said she might keep or destroy or do just what she liked with them - quite easy about it - she had thought it right to try to forget, did not - would not - say she had succeeded. Might have had a scene - the tears were in her eyes but Ι was too calm and philosophic. Jane left us and [I] was coming away without saluting but Mrs B willed it otherwise and Ι kissed her kindly but no more and quietly walked off - will be very civil, kind and attentive but no more nonsense whether she would or not" (17-Aug-1833). No more scrapes for Anne.


The road to Travemünde

Anne, Sophie, Eugenie & Thomas finally leave Paris at half past three on August 18, "Mademoiselle F- & Ι get on very well" - well enough for Sophie to pass on a bit of gossip about Mr de Hagemann (who we'll meet in Copenhagen): Mr de Hagemann a peasant's son brought up by the charity of a man whose daughter he now takes little notice of" (18-Aug-1833).

The party travels through Epernay, Verdun (Anne & Sophie seem to be quite intimate here, "Miss F has her cousin come or coming today", Longwy, Grevenmacher and TrêvesTrier, where "Miss Ferrall and Ι get on very well - it is quite evident she likes me. Joked her this evening about helping me to furnish a house here - she would do it for me, would come to me anywhere in any hole. It seems she and Madame de Bourne do not suit and she, Miss F, has no thought of going back" (23-Aug-1833), then to Wittlich "Miss Ferral and Ι in the same room first time"[5] (24-Aug-1833) "Miss F sleeps without night cap and in her day-shift". On leaving Wittlich Anne hears about "The Russian", just like in GJ: "She told me this morning in the car[r]iage of the Russian Madame de Bourne wished her to marry. An exile. First said he had sixty, then forty-thousand francs a year. A club foot and twenty-seven years older[6] than herself" (25-Aug-1833). The early start enables them to reach CoblentzKoblenz by 4:10. Then to Limburg, Marburg[7] and CasselKassel, where the diaries and GJ intersect: "At Kassel Miss Ferrall and Ι took a calache[sic] and went to visit the Palace d'Hercule, which was stunning, although the waterfall was a disappointment". The diary reads: "from hotel - took a calêche,[8] & drove off at 1:25 [to] Wilhelmsh[ö]he - fine drive - at the Hercules in an hour - the wood about the palace not old, almost all spruce fir - higher up the hill fine old beech forest - the grounds & winding drives up the hill the most à l'Anglais, & finest Ι have yet seen abroad - the palace D'Hercule, chateau d'eau or whatever they call it, is the huge rough building surmounted by a gigantic bronze statue, that one sees from all directions approaching Cassell - its famous water works commence their fall from the foot of the building - but all has been long out of order... the fountain, however, for the ten minutes it play[ed], was very pretty " (29-Aug-1833).

From Kassell to Göttingen on August 30 - it's on the road to Göttingen than Anne and Sophie have their in-carriage conversation about the Russian, etc: "A woman. Of your rank. Travelling alone. Is a curious thing. Has someone broken your heart?... Who is... He... She?". Just brilliant.

At Göttingen Anne has a cold & it's "still very bad - can hardly speak - ever since the day of leaving Marburg", still she "incurred a cross just before getting up thinking of Miss W" (1-Sep-1833).

Anne spends all of Monday (September 2) in bed, and stays indoors on Tuesday when "the funeral of Professor Blank passed under our window... the coffin on [a] large platform on 4 low wheels covered with black drawn by 4 horses so enveloped in black it was scarce possible to tell what kind of animals they were". After another "incurred a cross thinking of Miss Walker" the next day, the party leaves for Einbeck at 12:45, passing through NordheimNortheim and, according to Anne, "at 5:10 passed thro' Saltzburg with its considerable remains of its old ruined castle (right on the hill)... Saltzbourg seems a good village - meet the duke of something with his 3 carriages & 4... Saltzburg very picturesque situated on the little river Rhoume?".[9] Arriving at Einbeck at 5:40, the weather has been cold and wet since Göttingen - "rainy day - F58° now at 10 ½ p.m - put on woollen stockings & thick woollen sleeves this morning - perhaps my cold rather better tonight but Ι still feel weak & unwell & oppressed with it" (4-Sep-1833).

To Hanover on the 5th, for two nights. Anne & Sophie "very good friends now. She sat on my knee tonight and has kissed me these three nights, but Ι do it all very prope[r]ly" (6-Sep-1833).

"Off from the British Hotel Hanover at 9 ¼ - passed along the fine treble-allée'd lime-shaded road to Herrenhausen... dead flat to Neustadt... NiendorfNienburg - just out of the town pass old stone bridge over the Leine[10]... at Asendorf at 5:05... arranging to stay all night much to poor Miss F-'s disappointment & off at 5:40 in a small calèche & postilion (up with the postilion[11] & Thomas inside that Ι might see the country) to Memsen to see the king's cream-coloured stud of brood mares". Sophie, eager to get to Denmark, seems to have become a bit of a drag on Anne's wish to stop and see everything on the way; yesterday's "very good friends now" already forgotten: "Miss F so little thinking of my pleasure. Ι had said this morning sorry for the delay but really Ι might have been a month longer but for her anxiety to get to Hamburg. She was sorry to have been detrop[12] that Ι had said she was clearly enough etc. etc. Ι civilly said Ι did not mean to say so and slept or read and hardly spoke afterwards. If she was to be long delayed she thinks she should be mad - perhaps she is half so already. Ι have before felt gênèe[13] - now Ι do feel it thoroughly and shall be heartily glad to be rid of her. She would not go with me last night unless to be of use, that is if Ι could not do without her. Said Ι did not think it right to take her when she was so tired - her German has served me very little" (7-Sep-1833).

The next morning they leave Asendorf for Bremen at 11:05, passing through SickeSyke and "at 3:05 pay toll at the Bremen barrier & enter the outskirts of the town - the Weser right, banked up like a Dutch canal" - just like (Google Maps shows) it is today - "alight at the Lindenhof Bremen in the Grande Place at 3:20" (8-Sep-1833).

Anne sees as much as she can in Bremen, leaving at 1:40, and only going the 28 miles to RotensburgRotenburg "alight at the Gasthaus at 6:35 arrange for the night & saunter a little about the town - dinner at 8 (only a larded ham not well cooked, potatoes & bread & cheese - no beer to be had)". Anne closes the day's entry with a scathing dismissal of Sophie: "Miss F in my room, Ι having a queer dressing room. She said we parted very different from what Ι had been - not the same person these last three days - had been out of humour. Ι laughed it off, would not allow it or merely made a joke of it. Shall be too happy to get rid of her - she does me no good and is very stupid and odd" (9-Sep-1833).

"Off from the Gasthaus d'Oldenburg at Rotensburg at 7:55... no chaussées here 10 years ago when Miss F- passed this way - all the pavés done since the peace... at 2 first view of the Elbe and the 5 spires of Hamburg... at 2:22 at the HaarburgHarburg barrier... at 2 ½ at the Stadt Lüneburg (next to the river & Damp[f]schiff)."[14] On board and up river from 4:00 to 4:55 - "much incommoded by steam on setting off & arriving" - disembark and "then to the Stadt London Hamburg where Miss F- had been before - alighted there at 5 ¾ - all full but 1 back double-bedded room between the still room & the room where the family slept" (10-Sep-1833).

The next morning Anne is up at 6:45 and, presumably in the "double-bedded room"[15] with Sophie, "sat at her bedside till eight and after talking and occasionally kissing her very gently and properly - she nothing loth... then washed behind my bed curtain". Anne spends the day in Hamburg, sight-seeing and "paid 8 schillings for my ticket to the Cirque horsmanship... exceedingly amused there for about ½ hour... home at 6 ¼ - found Miss F- who had got back at 3 ¼... Miss F- things not arrived from Paris - many shipwrecks - fears they are lost - Ι behave very kindly to her, glad enough to see her but should do very well without her and shall be glad enough in reality to be without her. She sat on my knee this evening. Ι tell her she is not ugly and she is well enough inclined to flirt with me but Ι am very prudent" (11-Sep-1833).

The diary entry for the next day starts with a reference to Sophie: "Sat an hour at her bedside talking foolishly enough - for she was not ready till near ten and I, seeing the room swept etc, was delayed. She saying Ι was a great fidget and she could not live [with] me" and after another day out and about ends with another: "Stood talking to her half an hour. Her little dog had made water in the bedroom and on Eugenie's bed - could not sleep for its snoring last night - sick of it could not get another room so put my bed in the sitting room on the sofa and three chairs - wish Ι had done so before" (12-Sep-1833).

"Off from the Alten Stadt London, Hamburg, at 12:20... should have been comfortable enough without Miss Ferrall and her snoring disagreeable little dog", the party headed for ArensburgAhrensburg, where they were to visit the Countess Schimmelmann.[16] The road to Ahrensburg was abysmal, "worse than any cart road in England". Anne, blaming her for not telling her about the condition of the road, had fallen out again with Sophie by the time they arrived, describes their arrival thus: "Stop at la poste at Arensburg, good pretty village, at 3:20 - nobody waiting for Miss F- but she wished goodbye & walked off immediately to the chateau... Ι went into the poste house & made the woman understand me as well as Ι could what Ι wanted - in the meantime a well dressed man who shook hands with the postmistress, & who Ι somehow took for Countess Schimmelmann's butler, came to ask me to go & dine with her which Ι begged very civilly to decline till Ι found Ι should have had to wait for horses - walked along the nice little approach road to the house & there at 4:20 - my companion had talked to me of the bad roads & Ι should civilly said so little but not much wondering at the butler's attempting conversation - Ι soon afterwards however found him on the right of Countess S- & myself on her left at dinner but never made out who he was - Ι was ushered upstairs into a hall the whole depth of the chateau into which opened all the rooms - found the Countess S- a sallow, sickly interesting widow & her mother old Countess Blucher[17] a nice agreeable old gentlewoman - nice well bred people - in a few minutes dinner - the 3 ladies the oldest S- a fine boy of about 13, 2 more boys 1 about 3 & one in arms, my butler, 2 other gents who never spoke & an old nurselike? woman".

After dinner, having declined an offer to stay the night, "off from the Chateau at 5:35 - want to see the country... could distinguish nothing after 7 - the road always (tho' better) ill paved or deep sand". Then another rant about Sophie: about an hour or more from Arensburg Miss F took hold of my manner of saying she would have all the better of it in crossing the sea[18] and again said she was sorry she had come with me - Ι civilly remonstrated. She said (out of sorts) perhaps she did not understand English. Ι expressed as before (just out of Hanover) my anxiety for her to have an agreeable journey, my sorrow, etc. etc. and did not utter many words more. On leaving me she just kissed me and said she hoped Ι was not angry with her. Ι said 'Oh, no! Why should I?' and thus we parted, Ι heartily glad to get rid of her and her dog. If Ι cannot speak one word of German she cannot do much and has always been too careless to exert herself to help me beyond the mere thing Ι asked her to say. She says her aunt's impatience sinks into nothing compared with mine. She would not travel with me on any account and could not live with me - Ι hope she will never be tried. At the Stadt Hamburg, at Oldesloe at 9... What a luxury to be alone![19] Ι shall not wish for a companion again in a hurry" (13-Sep-1833).

On the 14th Anne travels the 14 miles to Lübeck, arriving early that afternoon. She stays in there until the 17th, when she completes the overland part of the journey at Travemünde, where she will board the ferry for Copenhagen. "At 3 ½ first sight of Travemunde... alighted at the Stadt Hamburg Travemunde at 3 ¼...[20] saw the carriage on board the 'Frederick Dem Siette' steamer, 80 horse power, built at Copenhagen, fine vessel... went back to the inn - enjoyed my mutton chop & went on board the steamer exactly at 6 p.m. Miss F met immediately an old acquaintance[21] - 'lucky,' thought I, Ι shall get comfortably rid of her. Ι had said to myself several times in the carriage Ι thought her the most disagreeable girl Ι ever saw and how heartily glad Ι should be to get rid of her... walked about till 9 ¼ & then went to my carriage for the night - lay across it with my feet upon my travelling bag pretty comfortably till perhaps between 12 & one or an hour later dozing or slumbering - then sick about every half hour till 8 or 9 in the morning but thank God Ι never suffer much from sickness" (17-Sep-1833).


Copenhagen

"Miss F & Eugenie had not been sick at all... first sight about 11 - not a very imposing looking town even when near, but pretty entrance into the harbour & a good town - Mr de Hagemann came off in a little boat to me on the steamer - advised about the carriage etc. Landed at 12 ¾ - took me to his house where Ι sat a few minutes with Lady Harriet (while he took Miss Ferral home to Count Blucher's) & then Lady Harriet brought me to the hotel Royal where we alighted at 1:25... nothing can be kinder than the de Hagemanns" (18-Sep-1833).

This is GJ day 58, when Anne asks about her letters and is disappointed not to get anything from Scotland. It's the next day that she mentions this in the diary: "No letter for me from Mrs Sutherland perhaps she did not quite like my last" - followed by a rather callous comment - "well Ι am easy about it - if Ι can only make my income do - it is all Ι want".

She may have been in a bad mood: a letter from Mariana (which tells of Charles Lawton being seriously ill) prompts her to write "nobody to assist Mariana but W Crewe and Mrs Wood... so Mariana would, as she seems to think, fall into WC's hands... about W Crewe she now sees plainly how it is - well, let her take him. Ι have lost all confidence in her - she can never be the same to me again. Ι doubt if we should be really happy together - let her take Willoughby and even in that case Ι doubt her perfect happiness" (19-Sep-1833).

But she's still tying herself up in knots in the next morning's coded entry: "Thinking of Mariana last night in bed even to tears. More satified this morning - let her take W Crewe. She will never again suit me? Why be like the dog in the manger about her? How odd if she should marry him and die of her second child as she in days of yore said her fortune was told her. It will not be a good match for her nor do Ι think she will be quite happy. But never mind - heaven has withheld what Ι for long so fondly wished and Ι am satisfied it was for the best" (20-Sep-1833).

"Madame Hage (the acquaintance Sophie Ferrall met on the boat) called between 10 & 11 & sat near an hour with me - then had Fife the coachmaker to take the carriage this afternoon for the little repairs necessary - then M. de Hagemann & staid near an hour - very civil & kind about calculating my expenses including carriage... Ι ought to live for £50 per month... Madame Hage seemed as if she would put me in her pocket - Since Lady Harriet told me she was Rospigliosi[22]- the famous dentist's daughter - and having before observed her English and manner were not first rate Ι have not thought much of her. Besides she is too much all at once. Ι believe she would be glad to travel with me - a hit at it this morning but Ι shall not be so easily caught again" (21-Sep-1833).

Anne's life in Copenhagen seems to be one endless social whirl - but Mariana is still on her mind: "Sat thinking of Mariana! Let her take W.C. We should not be happy together now - Ι have no confidence in her and she is vulgarish". On the same day Anne seems to have taken against Lady Harriet: "Lady H- took me to Madame Billé from 9 ½ to 9:48 to return her visit of the other evening & then set me down at home at 10 - the open calèche - and Ι had no hat on - she evidently does not like Madame and seems, as Miss Ferrall told me, inclined to say not much good of the place, court or people but Ι shall never enter in to it. She says the people envy their being able to do more than the rest can. Ι think she has a bad temper and after all that he, poor little man, is the best of the two - but she is all kindness to me. She does not seem really happy - probably the fault is in herself" (1-Oct-1833).

"Lady H- advised against my going to court here - said perhaps this might not be the last winter Ι might be here - she is as strongly as she can against my going to court - says the less Ι ask of the Brownes[23] the better. The fact is she and Mr De H are evidently not well with nor does like court either". Anne still seems to be interested in Sophie Ferrall, having a few days before described her as being "very pretty"; later that day:"Miss F very odd - in tears the latter part of the evening - impossible to guess why and talked as she used to do to me about indifference to life" (3-Oct-1833).

After dining at the Blüchers "tea about 8 - went to Lady Harriet at 9 to 10:40... Lady H- had written me a note to ask me to dinner tomorrow - she had probably thought Ι ought to have dined with her but Ι took no notice as Ι had luckily talked all that off on entering and we were capital friends. She said she had never dined with Countess B and how civil she was to me but seemed to think it quite right. The Bs are poor: we had soup, cold boiled corned beef, spinach with two poached eggs, a couple of ducks and cauliflowers and a sweetmeat large gateau. Well cooked but not neat and stylish as at the de Hs. Miss F and Count B spar - she can't take a joke - as disagreeable to them as to me - no, apparently better to me than to anybody. Ι think she must be a little beside herself - declares she won't go to Prince Christian's tomorrow" (5-Oct-1833).

"Countess B and Ι talked of the de Hs, how foolish they are about the court and how he gives himself airs and is therefore not liked and she made unhappy".

Out of the blue: "Let Mariana take Willoughby Crewe - she will not get hold of me again" (8-Oct-1833).

On the 10th Anne goes on a trip: "Lady Harriet came at 7:20 - she & Ι & Eugenie off at 8 - calêche - good road - dead flat... Roskilde the ancient capital of Denmark, but now a nice neat village-like little town - nice little inn - 4 Danish miles from Copenhagen... at Roskilde at 11:25" where they visit the cathedral and see "the six little coffins of the present king's children - 1 born before the time - another 4 years old, and one about a year old... off from Roskilde at 1:25 - still good road... to Ryeghaarn (Ryegaard), Madame de Rosenkrantz, widow of the minister of foreign affairs,[24] at 3:12 - tall fine looking elderly lady née princess [blank][25] of Petersburg - came up to dress almost immediately - dinner at 4:10... Madame R- very attentive & ladylike & mostly agreeable - came upstairs at 10 ½ - "a little awkwardness about shaking hands but Mrs R and Ι did it at last. Ι cannot make out if she likes me but fancy not. Dullish evening... to tell the truth a very stupid evening" (10-Oct-1833).

In the morning Anne offers Madame Rosenkrantz her hand again - which is "positively declined". "What is the matter with the woman - Ι fancied it might be reserve and shyness as she is so good and poor - nothing but a pension from the king - but Ι think now it must be pride? She is a stately dame and Lady H says is cold about shaking hands - she did not try her Ι think this morning - at least Ι did not see it nor did she see me refused. Miss de R[26] did and observed it - Ι like her very well". In her hotel that evening Anne notes that she's "glad enough to be back - Lady H very good but too chilly and rum drinking" (11-Oct-1833).

"Incurred a little cross thinking of Mariana just before getting up" (14-Oct-1833).

On Tuesday 15th there's a letter from Aunt Anne: "All well & good enough business news but my aunt has got a bad ankle - the skin broke & discharges a good deal ('white matter') & she suffers much from it, but Mr Sunderland gives hopes of it - tho' he does not dare heal it for fear of bad consequences - Perchance my poor aunt will have this open sore as long as she lives" - presumably the "ulcers on her leg". There's also news from Scotland, "Miss Walker wrote to her aunt of returning tho' she had not mentioned it to Mrs Suherland on account her Mrs Sutherland's not being well - why have Ι not heard from Mrs S-?". While out of town Mr Brown, the British chargé d'affaires, had called with the news that Anne's to be presented at court, and she's "going to have an audience of one of the princesses at 7 this evening" (15-Oct-1833) - although she doesn't seem to actually meet any of the princesses that evening, but she did meet the Danish prime minister, various diplomats and Princess Charlotte's Dame d'honneur - she went with Sophie Ferrall and Countess Blücher, which puts Lady Harriet's nose out of joint again - Anne patches things up a few days later:

"Rainy morning F52° at 9 - breakfast at 10:20 in 25 minutes - then at German[27] - then a little nap till 12:35 - then very kind note from Lady Harriet to say impossible to stir out in such rain - but if fine between 3 & 4 would come - at any rate would send the carriage for me to dine a little defore 5 - answer back can't thank her half enough - how very good of her! Could not possibly expect her today - will not be fine enough for her to stir out - will be happy to dine there... Lady Harriet came soon after - some time here talking to Eugenie about the dress for the Queen's birthnight on the 28th - then went with me to buy white satin etc. & head dress till 5:10 - dinner at Lady Harriet's at 5 ½ - coffee - tea at 9 - home at 10 ¼ in carriage of my own... my cold baddish today but had kept off sore throat - very well with the de Hs tonight - they pleased to see [me?] - not sparing anything to make my dress handsome. It will cost me altogether twenty pounds. He went to Madame Billé's for near an hour. Explained quietly to Lady H my anxiety to do all that was right and that my going with Countess B on Tuesday was really intended by all of us to be right - did not want to oblige and pother her, Lady H, to go up and down when it might not quite suit her. She owned she had been annoyed at Countess B - there was a particular feeling about it - the people seemed wishing to get hold of me. Besides, Madame Honschildelater "Madame Hochschild" did not like Countess B, much less Miss Ferrall - nobody seems to like the girl... Told Lady H Ι should depend upon her for telling me all that was necessary, never to mind what she heard Ι had said or done, always to ask myself, and we are now capital friends" (19-Oct-1833).

"[H]ad incurred a cross gently about nine, ne[i]ther quite thinking of Mariana nor letting it alone" (20-Oct-1833).


At court

The 23rd is the day Anne meets the queen; the diary has caught up with GJ (day 61). "Breakfast at 9 ½ & reading the Hamburg Reporter of the 18th instance till 10 ¾ - dawdled over 1 thing or other till 12... dressed - black satin gown - nothing over my neck but black/blonde pelerine - my thinnest black silk stockings and silk shoes - court mourning for the king of Spain - which meaans that everyone, not just Anne, was probably wearing black - at Mrs Browne's at 1 ¾ - took up her (went past & waited a few minutes) & then Mrs Stuart Courtenay & drove to the queen's palace a few minutes in the anteroom introduced to the maids of honour & to Countess Schuling [who] was waiting for her audience - unluckily took the chief maid for the Queen (because of her broad red riband order and star) got over it well enough and did not care so much as Ι might have - about 10 minutes audience of the queen. AetatisLatin:
"at the age of"
about 65?, a nice neat little figure looking very well but sadly too much rouged - very gracious and agreeable - then to Princess Caroline... about 5 minutes with her - not au fait at audiences like the queen... drove to the Bluchers - brought Miss Ferrall home with me & sent her back in the carriage at 4 -
to consult her about setting the blonde onto my white satin gown - she improved much upon Lady H's plan - dinner at 4 ¾ - had my front hair recurled & dressed & off at 5:55 to take up the two ladies again - then audience of Princess Christian (Caroline Amalia) very hansome... then audience of Princess Charlotte (i.e Princess William of Hesse)... plenty to say for herself & agreeable - till 7 ¾ Princess Wilhemina the king's daughter by many thought pretty... about 23... Ι thought her pretty - then to Princess JulianaPrincess Juliane who is the least intellectual herself of the princesses, & had the most intellectual maid of honour - she looked less princess-like than any of them... Ι went immediately to the Bluchers' left the carriage to Mrs Browne's disposal ordering it back for me (at the Bluchers') at 10 - tea & talking over my audiences - in love with Princess Christian... She and Mr Browne had talked of Miss Ferral and her wanting a husband. Ι gently disagreed and excused her and made the best of her and of all - Ι am determined to be Mrs Harmony - home at 10:40 - Ι wonder what they all thought of me. It was a great gaucherie to mistake the dame de honeur this morning for the queen but perhaps Ι shall get over it tolerably - Ι joked about it to the Bluchers this morning gently - Ι shall learn in time. Ι am very well satisfied with the day and find all the people très aimiable, & all the royal family very gracious - sat down chez toutes les princesses" (23-Oct-1833).

The 30th is the day of the Queen's birthday ball, GJ day 62. The day starts badly for Anne with "my cousin coming gently when Ι got up... had all to prepare... washing and putting on linen against my cousin", but there's lots to do: "Went to Lady Harriet's for her workon the gown?, then to Raffael's for silk stockings & home at 2:20 - gave Lady Harriet brioche & wine & some of the pears she brought me this morning for luncheon & she sat reading the peerage[?] while Ι dressed - put on clean stays and linen - the French hair dresser came at 3 ½ & in about ½ hour dressed my hair - put in my 2 birds of paradise - then sat talking to Lady Harriet... she seemed very cozy this morning & we talked very comfortably. Ι said Ι was sorry she did not go to court but as it was done she should carry it off quietly and never seem vexed about it. She took all Ι said very well and we are capital friends".

While she's writing up the day in her journal, Anne's mind wanders a little: "Ι have thought much of Miss Walker lately, in doubt whether to write again to Mrs Sutherland or not - what could Ι do with the poor girl? Ι have thought of Mariana to tears this morning too as [Ι was] walking but always end with she would not make me happy now, has lost my confidence, had better take Willoughby Crewe".

Back to the main event. In GJ the de Hagemanns are at the ball, but we now know that Lady Harriet "did not go to court". "Dressed - Mr & Mrs Browne called for me in [a] coupé[28] at 7 ½ - crowded of course - 1 of my biscaux de paradis came down in the carriage - Mrs B- arranged it on arriving at the queen's palace - Countess B- & Miss Ferrall had been there some time... About 8 the Cercledancing - might be about 50 ladies in front & as many more behind, & perhaps ½ as many more - the queen & princess Christian Caroline Amalia, then Caroline Princess Royale & then her younger sister Wilhelmina followed round the circle... very well amused - but now that Ι have seen the thing once will not trouble the marshall's table again - not fond of second table even in the houses of kings... Princess Christian the finest woman in the room & Miss Ferrall the prettiest best-dressed girl... all the princesses spoke to me conversationally. Ι generally on coming away remember some gaucherie but Ι don't care - Ι shall learn in time - very fine day - F60° now at 3:55 tonight" (30-Oct-1833) - It's been a long day.

"Out at 1:10 to Countess Blucher's for near ¾ hour - then took Miss Ferrall & the youngest little girl,[29] to the Long Line & kept the carriage waiting while we walked up & down for about an hour meeting almost all the royal family en voiture or on foot - must stop for the king or queen, but merely bow to the rest - home about 3... dressed - at the de H-s' to dine at 5 - coffee immediately after dinner - tea at 9 - not a soul came" (31-Oct-1833).

"Miss Lister" becomes Madame de Shibden: "M. Christiani[30] from 10:20 to 11 ½ - he is as Mrs Browne said very fond of talking... said the people wondered why Ι was here - came to learn the antiquity history etc. of the place? Was Ι only plain Madame - here where they lived on titles, could not understand being without them but they put the de to my name - yes! said Ι & much better they may than to many of their own people for Ι really have an estate to be called & they have not - Shibden - he repeated the word, as if to get it by heart to tell again... he said people could not imagine why anyone should come & stay here - nothing to see or be amused with - Ι praised the town & society - yes! he said Ι was well introduced, & could amuse myself with the society but that did not occur to people in general without title - He like all the rest holds the de Hagemanns cheap - Ι said she was as noble as Lord Castlereagh Mr Christiani talks so much of; few could be peers in England. [Christiani] asked about Mr Brown - [I] said he too was, as well as I, of the lesser noblesse and of a very good family" (2-Nov-1833).

Having "incurred a cross last night thinking of Mariana", there's another ominous letter "from my aunt at Shibden - she had had Dr Kenny as well as Mr Sunderland to her ankle which shews no disposition to heal & from which she suffers a great deal" (8-Nov-1833).

Anne's sexual fantasies continue to feature Mariana, rather than Ann: "incurred a cross last night thinking of Mariana - merely for the cross, not affectionately" (10-Nov-1833), and again three days later: "incurred a cross just before getting up thinking of Mariana merely as a mistress" (13-Nov-1833).

On the 19th Anne gets the letter about aunt Anne's gangrene from Dr Kenny; on GJ day 64 we see Anne in her new apartment with the letter, the script following very closely Dr Kenny's text (which Anne copied into the journal). There's also a letter from Marian: "'Ι know you cannot come home, for my aunt has no idea of the danger, & Ι fear it might be a great shock to her... she thought she had not stamina to bear so much suffering long - Ι afterwards when Ι could, without creating suspicion, said, if she would like to have you here, were Ι her, Ι would send for you. She said no, you could do her no good - Ι had before said something of the sort, but she thought it nonsense tho' were she in danger she should wish to see you - that Ι trust you will so manage matters, that without alarming her, you can come over in the spring or early in the summer tho' Ι still persuade myself she will struggle on till autumn... my aunt is very cheerful when her suffering in not very great'".

Anne's initial response is "Both Marian & Dr K- are of old alarmists - Ι scarce know what to think". Later the same day "told Lady Harriet of the letter Ι had received this morning - anxious & unsettled about it - might have to return to England any time - had not named it to the Bluchers & begged her not to name it except to Mr de H-." (19-Nov-1833).

"Very little prepared for her & Dr Kenny's joint letter... accustomed to think Dr K- an alarmist - but wish to hear from him & Marian again & also from Mr Sunderland - should not be satisfied without hearing from him, & ask what Cordingley thinks - 'Leaving here now would be more or less difficult, & tedious, if it was not necessary; but Ι would not willingly omit paying my last duties to one who has been to me like the best & kindest of parents' - Little else but about my aunt - mention taking possession of my apartment 158 Amaliagade on Friday & having hired a cook" (20-Nov-1833).

A week later there's a "joint letter from my aunt & Marian perhaps the last my poor aunt will write" which makes up Anne's mind: "Dr K- thinks perhaps Ι may get back in time to see her - Ι will be off immediately - meant to have dressed for the de Hagemanns tonight, before dinner - stood fixed over my letter - could not well eat my dinner at 5 1/5... off to the de H-s' at 8 ½ Madame Bille there & staid supper till about 11 - Ι staid afterwards talking of my poor aunt & returning heaven knows how painfully - M. de H- warmly urged my remaining quiet as Ι could do no good by going, put it upon the expense and my health and how odd people would think it and how it would be talked of" (28-Nov-1833).


Back to England

The journey from Copenhagen to London is brutal, and Anne describes it so well that Ι've added very little commentary to the following diary transcriptions.
Anne leaves Copenhagen on November 30, 1833, evidently hoping to return the following year. It seems that her new friends are genuinely sorry to see her go: "Busy over 1 thing or other & not quite dressed when Lady Harriet came at 10 - very good & helped me great deal... Ι talked of returning next May - but she evidently did not much expect my doing so - nobody could be kinder... had no time to breakfast till between 12 & one when Countess De Blucher & Miss Ferrall came & they & Lady Harriet staid all the while till they saw us off - Miss d'Oxholm called to say everything civil for herself and her princess (Princess Charlotte, i.e. Princess William of Hesse) - Miss Watterstaff called to say everything civil for herself & her princess (Caroline Amelie i.e. Princess Christian) - Lord Hillsborough[31] came in & out... also Mr Peter Browne... nobody could be more civil and attentive in getting all arranged for me, even to the ordering of the horses...
"Mrs Hage called for a few minutes saying she could not let me go away without seeing me... 2 very civil notes from Miss During saying everything gracious on the part of the queen & everything very civil on her own part... very civil note too from Mademoiselle de Levetzau saying everything gracious for the princess royale Princess Caroline - and everything civil for herself - In short, nothing can exceed the polite & kind attention of the court & of everybody, - everybody thinking me right to go... if Ι did not, should never forgive myself...
"Fredric aged 12 & Albinia aged 9the de Hagermanns' children, & Countess de Blucher's 2 little girls, aged 6 and 3 (Sophie & Fanny) very nice handsome children came to take leave of me - How comfortable Ι might have been this winter had my poor aunt been well! But perhaps Ι have made friends to go back to; & it is enough - just took Miss Ferrall aside & gave her one of my little Rogers 15/- mother of pearl penknives from Sheffield saying 'see if this cuts away your love before my return' - she just murmured 'that is very nice of you' & Ι staid not to hear more - Ι really think she has some regard for me -
she had said before Ι was always praising her sister, her eyes or something and never her, Miss F, which she did not like. 'Oh', said I, 'if you can be jealous it is enough'.

"Off at 3:55 p.m. from Copenhagen, with regret to leave behind so much real & flattering kindness yet deeply anxious to be home in time to see my poor aunt alive - Eugenie & Ι inside - Lord Hillsborough & Thomas behind... by the time we had got to the first turnpike too dark to see anything - slept most of the way - at Roskilde at 7 ¾" (30-Nov-1833). They travel through the night, taking more than 14 hours to cover the 70 miles to the port - less than five miles an hour.

It's a Sunday so the carriage can't be put on the boat for the short crossing[32] to Nyborg on the Danish island of Funen: "At KorsörKorsør pronounced Corseur at 6:25 - the steamer not allowed to take carriages on a Sunday - could take mine tomorrow but not today - no matter, a sailing vessel would go at 9 & the wind pretty fair that the carriage would be over as soon as we... embarked on the Mercurius steamer at 11... about ½ way the engine was stopped for about ½ hour - something broke - for a little while thought the accident could not be repaired & we must make for another port - however made Nyborg at 2:20 (about 20 English miles)... Nyborg a nice little town - good inn - the best in this island Fyen or FunenFyn or Funen & none so good in SealandZealand... off from Nyborg at 4 ¾... sad pity to pass thro' this island in the dark... at Odense at 7:10 in 2:25 hours, 4 Danish miles about 17 English miles, proof of the goodness of the road" (1-Dec-1833).

"At MiddlefartMiddelfart at 12:50 at night - had been raining heavily for some time - for the last 2 hours - Lord H- & Thomas much wet - the former wanting to go on and cross the belt[33] immediately - Thomas who is not very hard[y] begged to stay to dry his clothes - told Lord H- he would find it cold work across the Belt & persuaded her to stop... off from the Inn at Middelfart at 6 ¼ - tho' it was close to the water we had to go (along a nice road) 20 minutes before getting to the embarking place - 10 minutes embarking the carriage on board a large open flat-bottomed boat - over at SnoghoiSnoghøj in 10 minutes at 6 - 20 minutes disembarking the carriage - no horses - but on seeing Lord H-'s courier's passport the postmaster took 4 horses for us from a waggon standing by... off from Snoghoi, merely the posthouse & a good-looking inn, at 7 ¾ - the Belt here is merely like a fine bending river". The day's journey takes them to "Apenrade" - Aabenraa? - via Kolding and HaderslebenHaderslev where they stop for "½ hour at the inn - got bread & butter & cheese & meat... Apenrade at 7:40" (2-Dec-1833).

"Flensburgin modern-day Germany at 1 ½ a.m. - not lighted... F35°1.7°C; at 2 ½ tonight - Rumblerumble seat broke down at 6:25 - tied it up with cords - Lord H- sat atride of the travelling bags on the boot & lastly stood on the rumble step behind... at Schleswig at 8:20... an hour here greasing wheels and putting travelling bags behind to make Lord H- a tolerable seat on the boot - off at 9:20... stopt at 10 ½ to bait the horses - this would only have taken 10 minutes but we had bread & cheese & the servants & Ι my own wine - Lord H- had corn brandy (sometimes made of potatoes) get nothing else sometimes in Norway - Ι tasted it - took not more than a teaspoonful - seemed like fire in me... Rendsburg at 1 ¼... at BramstedtBad Branstedt at 11:50 p.m. - Both the outside people sadly wet - Thomas came close to the stove & there complained of both his legs being stiff & cold - as if asleep - having no feeling in them & was sadly frightened for himself - and asked anxiously if Ι meant to go forwards immediately?" (3-Dec-1833). Of course she did.

"Off from Brandstedt at 12:25 tonight i.e. on Wednesday morning & from here we got on to the Kiel road - really very good - a fine new macadamized chaussée - never go to Copenhagen by Lubeck again - tho' be it remembered there are no custom house potherations at Lubeck & an infinity of them at Kiel - at the Altona gate [Hamburg] at 5:35 - could not possibly have got in but for Lord H-'s despatches & courier's passport - at the Alten Stadt London at 6:10... waited ½ hour for an answer from Lord H- to know whether the packetpacket steamer was really gone or not - yes! off at 3 - in spite of wind & weather... Thomas knocked up... sent him to bed about 8 - Eugénie who had been very much fatigued in the carriage, luckily cheered up, & went about very well - poor Thomas is sadly soft & cowardly about himself and a great lout... undressed & went to bed in my greatcoat at 9 ¼ - slept - Eugénie called me & Ι got up at 2 ¼ - Lord H. called at 2:50 & waited for me 25 minutes & we sat talking till after 4 - dinner at 5 ¾" (4-Dec-1833).

Having missed the boat the day before Anne has a few days to kill in Hamburg: "Breakfast at 9 ½ - at my desk at 10 ½ - Lord H- who was to have came at 9 did not come till 11 & then for a few minutes to say his portmanteau was not come - had hardly gone away before he returned to introduce Mr Henry Canning our consul general here, a gently pleasant man - he was exceedingly civil - half tried to persuade me to go by Rotterdam - should be in time for the packet of Wednesday & then be certain of being in London on Thursday - but owned that if the weather was not very bad Ι might be in London on Monday or farthest Tuesday by the Columbine from here at 6 on Saturday morning... Dinner at 5 ½... wrote out journal of Tuesday & yesterday & came to my room at 9" (5-Dec-1833).

"Dinner at 5 ½ - then packing travelling bag etc. looking over map of Germany & almost tired of waiting for Mr Canning's carriage when Lord H- came with it at 8 ½ - off in 5 minutes at the river in ¼ hour - on board the Columbine (a longish way to row in a small boat) at 9 - Lord H- really very attentive... took his leave at 10 ¼ promising to write me some hints for Norway & leave them with old Lady Stuart... walked on deck till 11 ½ p.m. & then crept into my cot - did not undress nor shall Ι during the voyage - only 4 births[sic] in the cabin at the stem & nobody but Eugenie & myself" (6-Dec-1833).

On deck at 8 ¾ & were then 12 miles English from Hamburg - walked up & down till 11 ¼ when drizzly rain sent me to my cot... we started at 7 ¼ this morning... our vessel the Columbine,[34] Captain John P. Corbin (this is his 21st voyage from here to London) has 2 engines of 60 horse power each - in my cot lying down from 11 ¼ to 4 ½ (had declined dinner about 2 ¼) & then got up & found we had been for about two hours since 2 ½ p.m. at anchor in Cuxhaven Harbour the wind being too strong for us to venture out to sea... between 5 & 6 the captain & steward gone on shore - said Ι would have gone too had Ι known, but they told me it was up to the knees in mud... had about a tablespoon of brandy in 3 or 4 times as much water & a little dry bread & lay down at 10:50 - still raining hard" (7-Dec-1833).

"Incurred a cross thro' my drawers think[ing] of Mariana (but not affectionately) between nine and ten - heavy rain & high wind all night - to prevent our rolling about in the night the captain had run us up within the wooden break-water - the wind was so high we broke from our mooring and at midnight ran foul of the pier & broke our bowsprit. When Ι went on deck at 10 ¼ a.m. found the people busy 8 hours making a new one of an old schooner bowsprit the captain had bought on shore" (8-Dec-1833).

"Incurred a cross thinking of Mariana oddly merely as a mistress - breakfast immediately & hurried on deck at 10:20 - Cuxhaven was already far behind, for we had cleared out of the harbour 25 minutes ago... passed the wrecks of 2 brigs - the last with ½ her masts standing up out of the water was the Hamburg brig lost on Sunday morning in the gale that broke our bowsprit at 12 a.m. on Saturday night... at 1 ½ rain sent me to my cabin & this & the rough water made me sick immediately - threw myself on the [illeg] bench at the foot of the cots & sick & reachingretching alomost incessantly for the next eleven hours tho' somehow about ten at night crawled in the dark into the water closet and had a tolerable motion... the wind was soon getting out of the river in our favour - towards evening the vessel rolled so tremendously nothing not very fast could keep its place - my table & stool were turned upside down to slide about that way - my candle was set in a basin jammed in my table bottom the candlestick danced about so in the basin Ι could scarce help laughing - cooler on the bench than in my cot, & more convenient for being sick, so there Ι lay in my cloak & fur travelling cap with my tavelling bag for a pillow - rough night - wind & rain & snow... sea cross & rough as ever" (12-Dec-1833).

On the evening of the 14th the Columbine arrives in the Thames, but it can't dock until the following morning (probably waiting for high tide). In GJ (day 68) Thomas wakes up Anne: "Ma'am? We're approaching Gravesend Docks" - the diary tells us he lets her know that they've arrived: "At 2:20 by my watch (50 minutes too soon by the clocks at the Ship Tavern!) Thomas came in to my cabin to say we were arrived... landed in a small boat & walked (a very short distance) to the Ship Tavern Water Lane at 3 - a dirty looking place - no help for it - anything better than on board? - remade (threw off) the bed of soft feathers, & the sheets which had been slept in - got plenty of water - made all as comfortable as Ι [could?] - put a towel over my uncased pillow, & my dressing gown to serve as a top sheet about face & threw myself in bed in my greatcoat at 4 ¾ a.m... up again at 10:20".

Ι don't think that Anne disembarked at Gravesend: there is only one mention in the diary: "fine star light & [illeg.] moonlight for some time but when we lay to at 9:50 rather obscure - fine again[?] at Gravesend which looked lighted up in a fine crescent of pairs of lights along the water's edge". Gravesend is also on the wrong side of the river and over 20 miles from Whitehall (see below), and Ι can find no record of either a Water Lane or a Ship Tavern there - but there was a Ship Tavern in Water Lane[35] in the City of London, very close to the Custom House which Anne mentions.

The diary continues with a note to Lady Stuart: "wrote note to 'the honourable Lady Stuart, Whitehall' to ask if she was there - say Ι arrived at 2 yesterday morning in 9 days thankful for a bed on shore were at the Ship Tavern Water Lane... should be off tomorrow as soon as Ι could get the carriage - if at home this evening should be delighted to see her, and would be with here about 8 - sent Thomas about one and a boy to show hime the way - to bring back the note if Lady Stuart not there" - this would have been impossible from Gravesend - "my note and message back that Lady Stuart, Lord & Lady Stuart de Rothesay & the young ladies all at the lodge - then Ι shall go by Richmond & see them all tomorrow - till 4:40 repacked my travelling bag... had my hair washed my head needing it after its so long heating in my fur cap - dressed again - dined in 35 minutes at 6:40 i.e. not quite 6 here".

Then a letter to Mariana: "begin at Hamburg Friday 6th instance... & finished tonight - saying we left Cuxhaven on Thursday at 9 ¾ a.m. and landed at 2 this morning - glad to come to the Ship Tavern after 48 hours sickness - yet whether from anxiety or not had not once felt fatigued - tho' 5 nights from Copenhagen to Hamburg without taking my clothes off, & 10 nights from Hamburg here[36] - shall be off as soon as Ι can get the carriage from the custom house tomorrow but that will not be before 10 or 11 - today no postday, fear Ι shall arrive nearly as soon as my letter - have not been able to write before - the surprise to my poor aunt will be very great - hope my pages to Mariana will not precede me many hours - hope to be with them to dine but not to wait a moment - it is possible Ι may be early 'so if you go out, leave word where you are to be found - Have a bed for me, if you can; as the night Ι spend on the road Ι would rather spend with you' - shall tell my aunt to expect me on Thursday - dated London Sunday evening 15 December 1833".

And one to Aunt Anne: "shall be off tomorrow on getting the carriage... return by Leamington to leave Eugenie there - the roads will be heavy - can't[?] exactly calculate how Ι can get on; 'but you may expect me certainly on Thursday evening, by 6 or 7 Ι hope' - will dine on the road so shall only want tea... had another bottle of soda water & off to bed at 8 ¾" (15-Dec-1833).

In GJ Sally Wainwright cleverly integrates some of the day's diary into the dialogue (although Anne's party is mistakenly placed at Gravesend Docks): "The carriage won't be released from the customs house until at least ten o'clock tomorrow morning, and then the roads north are going to be heavy and slow and "But with luck... yes. We can be at Shibden by Thursday tea-time".


Shibden

The next four pages of the diary are blank - as Anne Choma suggests in her book[37] no doubt Anne intended to, but never got around to, bring the journal up to date at some point. The first entry is for December 21; there's a brief reference to the journey from London: "went by High Wycombe - stopt ½ hour for soup & sandwiches at Oxford - at Leamington near 10 - Lawtons not there - sat an hour with V-[38] (looking very thin but very well - 'the baby the fattest little thing Ι ever saw' took so much notice of me quite delighted with it) - thence forward & reached Lawton [Hall] at 11 - Mrs L- 'quietened my apprehensiveness about my aunt' so did not reach here till Thursday evening".

In a letter to Lady Stuart de Rothesay Anne sums up her aunt's condition: "'Ι have found my aunt so very much better than Ι expected, that Ι have no fear of her not getting over the winter; & she may even continue many months longer - she says, she felt better the moment she got my letter - and the surprise & pleasure had had so powerful an effect, that the appearance of her leg is quite changed - the alarming tendency it had to gangrene is wearing off; and the threat of immediate danger is gone - the manner in which she had roused up from an apparent fixed indifference about everything, is really quite extraordinary'... sat talking to my aunt till after 9 when she went to bed - Really she talked quite as cheerfully as before Ι last left home & is so well it is difficult to think of here as being in any near danger" (21-Dec-1833).

It's not until the 23rd that Anne gets to remonstrate with Dr Kenny: "Dr Kenny came at 1 ½ - my aunt may continue 2 or 3 years tho' he does not seem to think she will - told him it was unfair & absurd to send for me under such circumstances - Ι had come at the risk of my own life & that of my servants - he said it was not his doing - he wished Marian not to send for me, but she did it in her fright". The same day there's a letter from Mariana Ι think she begins to be sorry for herself - likes me better than Willoughby Crewe and thanks me for my uniform kindness and generous conduct" (23-Dec-1833).

In GJ Anne goes straight to Shibden from London, without writing to Aunt Anne, arriving on day 71 when poor Dr Kenny gets it in the neck, Anne claiming she hadn't "taken this coat off for fifteen days", where in fact she'd had stopovers in both Hamburg & London, and had also visited Mariana on the way home. Suranne Jones does look great in the spencer with her hair down though.

Unfortunately Ann doesn't really get back from Scotland the same day - but very soon after, arriving back at Lidgate on Christmas day. She calls at Shibden Hall the same day and, just like in GJ, finds that Anne is back in England, having just missed Anne who had left for York and the Norcliffes at Langton the day before.

"Off to York at 7:05 - at Leeds at 10:40 - drove to Mr Edward Hope 88 & 89 North Street & left with him the 2 old picture frames Ι had brought to be gilded for the picture of my great uncle Lister now in Marian's room & for the gentleman in arms... stopt in passing thro' Tadcaster at Briggs's to ask the pair of carriage horses - would furnish me a good strong pair at about £45 each - said Ι did not wish to go beyond £40 each - £80 for the pair - alighted at Mr Duffin's door, York at 3 ¼ - promised to return & dine with them at 5... drove to Myers the carriage maker's, said Ι would send the carriage back to have the blind mended & did so after it had set me down at Mrs Belcombe's in the Minster Yard - she very unwell, confined to her room... Mrs Milne just returned on Saturday from Langton - Mr Bulcock & Louisa Belcombe there - staid about ¾ hour (think Mrs Milne would not perhaps fancy me cold) then sat with Mrs Henry Belcombe till almost 5 - the rest had heard of me from the N[orcliffe], she surprised & glad - at the Duffin's at 5:05 - poor Mrs Duffin much waned towards dotage... Mr Duffin much as usual... off from Micklegate at 6 ¾ and to Langton at 9:35 - tea - Mrs N- better than Ι expected - all glad to see me" (24-Dec-1833).

While at Langton Anne gets a letter from Ann, who "arrived at Huddersfield on Tuesday night, but was too sick at heart to go home till the next day (Xmas day) when she called at Shibden & wrote the second page of her letter & left it with my aunt to direct & send off - 'Whilst you are in England Ι hope you will consider my little cottage as your own - Ι have plenty of accommodation for your servants, & 2 rooms entirely at your own disposal, to keep your own hours & do exactly as you like - and so long as Ι have a cottage or a room, the half will be for you' - she had near passed thro' York on her return & would have consulted Dr Belcombe but could not without telling her uncle Atkinson who was with her[39] - would like to meet me in York on my return & go to Dr B- 'with the full intention of following his advice to the very letter'". Sounds like a "Yes" to me, but Anne's reacts "poor girl! Ι fear she is not much better".

She replies immediately: "'Ι am surprised & glad to find you once more at Lidgate. Ι can see from the style of your letter, that you are, at any rate, not less well than when Ι saw you last - this gives me great hope - Chin up - you are quite surei.e. "can be sure" Ι will do anything in the world Ι can for you; and, if you have at last courage to follow my advice, Ι am sanguine about your being restored to that which can alone make life enjoyable, sound health - again & again all Ι ask of you is, to cheer up - thank you for your so kind offer of house-room - Ι shall see you as soon as Ι can - It was the so indifferent state my aunt's health that caused my return to England - get over to Shibden again not earlier than one or later than two in the day, if you can, and give my love to my aunt, & tell her, Ι have sent you to sit with her ten minutes & to say, that Ι shall write to her again in a few days - It will be better for you not to think of meeting me in York - Ι will see you first, & then plan for you as may seem best - Depend upon it, Ι can manage for you very nicely - Keep up your spirits as well as you possibly can - You are very good about the rooms - but you know I am not very clever about keeping house - Ι will write to you again as soon as Ι have fixed the day for leaving here (which will probably be about a week hence) & then if you will have 2 beds for me, Ι will return by Birstall, see how you are, & so think[?] what to do - write to me again, immediately on receipt of this letter - Direct to me, Mrs Norcliffe, Langton Hall, Malton, give my love to your aunt & my own, & believe me affectionately & faithfully yours A L-' Ι read her letter wrong - it was 'keep your own hours' not keep house... Poor girl! how extraordinary my return & hers too so close and unexpected on each other!" (27-Dec-1833).

A couple of days later Anne "told Charlotte[40] how completely cured Ι am about Mariana" (29-Dec-1833).

A letter from Countess Blücher in Copenhagen with the "ends written & crossed by Miss Ferrall" who is "really jealous of my having [written?] to her sister instead of herself - owns she, Miss F, is fonder of me than anyone - How much Ι am regretted at Copenhagen - must return".

There's a letter from Ann as well, who "will count each day and hour to my arrival - cannot be too grateful to me... then wrote 2 pages & 2 or 3 lines to 'Miss Walker, Lidgate, Halifax' to keep Miss Elizabeth Atkinson with her till Saturday morning then take her home saying she expected me in the evening - on second thoughts should leave my servants at Shibden & then after seeing my aunt, be at Lidgate about 8 in the evening of that day - she had better not say anything about going to York till the plan was finished - my letter altogther a kind one - she should cheer up now she has so much reason to hope all she could desire - will do all Ι can for her - neber to think of repaying me - once well again, her health & happiness would be enough & all that Ι desired - 'affectionately & faithfully yours AL'" (30-Dec-1833).

And so the year ends; the disappointment at having to leave Copenhagen early at least partly made up for by the reappearance of an apparently compliant Ann.


York

By the 3rd of January Anne's no longer fantasising about Mariana: "incurred a cross thinking of Miss Walker".

That day Anne & Isabella transfer to York, where Anne starts making plans for Ann. She will arrange for Ann to be under Dr Belcombe's care for an extended period, arranging lodgings in York. "Came to the Black Swan at 7 - dressed - at Dr B[elcombe]'s at 8 - talked to him about lodgings for Miss Walker & myself & if Phillips could & would cram[?][41] me for travelling - thought Ι had better take Miss W- to Copenhagen with me... Ι.N. came home in a cab & Ι in a chair at 11" (3-Jan-1834).

Anne heads back to Halifax the next day, after "Mrs M[ilne][42] and Ι flirting all the morning - she thought me an iceberg as Ι passed thro' to Langton this time, she will never be satified for Ι get tired of her and don't like to be seen with her... Made the best of my journey to Shibden (never stopt in Leeds) & arrived at 8 - a little while with my father & Marian & then with my aunt who seems to have been poorly during my absence - her leg more inflamed - but she seemed pretty well".

There's a desperate letter waiting for Anne at Shibden: "Letter also 3 pages & ends & every page crossed from Mariana... not well - bad cold & swelled face - means to be 'quite happy' - more perhaps than she can command at will... 'Fred you even know not how the slightest word can throw back my feelings upon myself. Before Ι heard that line[43] my heart was warm and light - in one instant it was cold and heavy and has remained so in this instance ever since. It felt to be harshly judged and Ι suppose Ι would have gone miles round rather than encounter the individual who had chilled it. My head and my words are very commonplace but my heart has no affinity with either and often suffers more than many think. God bless you always. With affection and tenderness, Yours, Mariana' Any humbug in the above? 'Miss Walker returned to Lidgate!!! Fred, is this to be your fate? Ι'm glad Ι have never seen her - you told me she had repented - how strange here[sic] return at this time. It puts me in mind of the Gipsey's prophecy to me, & the thought would almost persuade me that we are not free agents - If in any momemt of your life you have fancied yourself hardly dealt with, how must the last few years have balanced your account - all difficulties so indeed vanish before you & Ι believe you have only to desire what you like best, & it is sure to come' - changed my dress - took John [Booth] to carry my night things & off (walked) to Lidgate at 9:10 & there at 9:35 ("Ι can walk anywhere in 25 minutes") Miss W- delighted to see me - looking certainly better in spirits than when Ι saw her last; but possibly the improvement is mainly the result of the present pleasure & excitement on seeing me - dined (a mutton steak) then tea & coffee - and went upstairs at 11:40" (4-Jan-1834).

Real life has now caught up with Gentleman Jack - even though it's really taken a whole extra year to get to this point. The next GJ scene for Anne & Ann is their marriage in the beautiful Holy Trinity Church at York which, as we all know, happened on Easter Sunday, 1834 - which was on March 30, so still another three months to go.

Before we get to see Holy Trinity there's another GJ church to visit: Thomas Sowden's and Suzannah Washington's wedding on the same day as Anne & Ann's - even though Thomas Sowden didn't actually exist and Susannah Washington was only nine in 1833. But it's a lovely service (even if Mrs Washington still isn't happy about the match) and Thomas signs the register - he's learnt to write! Which is more than we can say for Uncle "Ι can't write" Ben, who lets slip that he hadn't written to tell Thomas & Mrs Sowden that Sam had "taken himself off to Liverpool and then sailed to America". Mr Washington immediately realises something's up. Happen we'll see the fallout in series 2?

The first diary entry after their reunion is not positive; they both still seem to be prevaricating, just as before. It's actually rather sad: "Much talk till 4 this morning & then not asleep for a long while - She repented having left me - longed to go after me to Copenhagen. Had had Mr Ainsworth writing and offering again etc. etc., once thought she ought to marry - lastly refused him. Her sister told him she was not able to judge for herself but he did not mind that so both Captain and Mrs Sutherland got annoyed at him, Ι suppose saw thro' him. Miss W talks as if she would be glad to take me, then if Ι say anything decisive she hesitates. Ι tell her it is all her money which is in the way - the fact is she is as she was before, but was determined to get away from the Sutherlands and feels the want of me. But [Ι should?] take someone with more mind and less money. StephDr Belcombe is right: she would be a great pother, [I] have nothing serious to say to her. She wants better manning than Ι can manage. Ι touched her a little but she soon said that exhausted her. Ι had my drawers on and never tried to get near knowing that Ι could not do it well enough. Ι am weak about her. Oh! that Ι may get well rid of her - breakfast at 9 ½ - sat talking - left her alone in the house & came to read prayers to my aunt - walked in ½ hour & came in at 12 - prayers at 12 ¼ to my aunt & her maid & Eugenie & Thomas in about ½ hour - then saw my aunt's leg dressed - she said how much better it looked that it did yesterday - in fact, Ι am not of Marian's croaking opinion - came up to my study at 2 - sidingtidying up & writing out yesterday & so far of today - & off again at 5:50 & at Lidgate in ½ hour - dinner at 6 ¼ - coffee & tea at 8 ½ - read a chapter in St. Matthew & prayers to the servants & came to my room at 10:20 - fine day -" (5-Jan-1834).

The next day's coded entry is, Ι think, very revealing (in more way than one). "At twelve last night felt her on the amoroso; she thought me asleep and Ι pretended to be so till my fondness seemed to awake me - pressed and partly grubbled and held her near me, but had on my drawers, in fact Ι had as much a kiss[44] as possible without absolute contact - dared not be nearer, uncertain how she would make up her mind about [me?] and afraid of attaching myselt[sic]myself to her. Too much pressing and feeling her this morning - she let me look at her without seeming to care. In fact Ι might do all Ι could - not do enough - Ι am older in these matters than Ι was twenty years ago. She seems bent on taking me but yet it is uncertain for she says nothing quite positive - 'tis well my care for her will not kill me whether she says eventually yes or no" (6-Jan-1834).

"A little pressing and grubbling last night but Ι am not for more of it than Ι can help - read prayers - breakfast at 9 ½... read last Saturday's Chronicle London 3 days a week paper - out about 11 ½ walked with Miss W- by Lower Brea and along my walk to here - she paid her visit to my sister & was a little while in the drawing room with my aunt & a longish while with me in my study - lent her (took back with me) volume 38 of British Essayists - then walked back with her to Lidgate to leave the book & then to Cliffhill where Ι left her at the gate at 2:40 then here & came to my study - wrote out yesterday & today - Wonder how all this will end. She makes sure of me if she chooses and talks as we both do as if all was fixed, but still she says nothing positive. Ι don't care much about it and perhaps Ι shall get off again without her and then be rid of her".

Anne then copies out a letter for Mariana, which Ι think is so beautifully written that Ι've transcribed it in its entirety:
'Things happen so oddly, - we are always so little able to calculate our fate; & there is generally so much good we never think of, that trust me, it is a mauvais calculmiscalculation to look too attentively on the darker side of anything - How can we say that even our mistakes shall cost us as dear as we fancy they must? In these matters, we pay only by instalments; & the remainder of our debt is often forgiven us when we least expect it - think not Mary, of "unstrung nerves" - think only that with increasing experience & improved discernment, you have added powers of setting right the wrong, & of bending circumstances more & more as you would have them - Ι remember what you allude to about my aunt - it was rather an observation to me, than a message to you - you know my aunt's regard for me, & should make much allowance for a feeling that might have been your own had you been in her place. You say "my head & my words are very commonplace, but my heart has no affinity with either" - this may indeed be more true than you ever before taught me to believe; but remember, our most familiar friend must judge of us in some sort by our words; & we ouselves should watch these narrowly when we know that they are not in unison with, or do injustice to, our feelings - But cheer up my dearest Mary, Ι never despaired of you or myself - if Ι see you dispirited & unwell, it must make me uneasy & unhappy in the midst of all the blessings that may surround me - Pray what was the gipsy's prophecy? Ι am curious to know - Do pray tell me - But the fact is, you yourself are the gipsy, the fortune-teller & the fortune-maker - Providence leaves us free - 'tis we enthral ourselves and you twisted round the thread of my fate; for Ι had left it in no human power but yours - Miss Walker's return is indeed odd - your surprise could not exceed my own - But do not let your conclusion run on too rapidly - now that Ι have taken my fate into my own hands, believe nothing till Ι tell it you myself - Ι know well enough what all the world will think;- but all the world my be wrong - you can't be otherwise than interested about me; & Ι shall not leave you to hear my history secondhand - all Ι wish at present is a better acoount of yours - scarcely know what to think of my aunt - she suffers a great deal; but still Ι can't help agree with Cordingley, that she may & will linger many months' - Eugenie sleeps in my room - Ι here 3 or 4 hours in the day & then return to Lidgate - 'If the house was my own, more pains could not be taken to make me comfortable' - but back & forwards work out not agreeable & no chance of its ending these 3 or 4 weeks - 'By the way, Miss Walker says she remembers you, &, Ι daresay, would count up your good wishes - Ι had been at Copenhagen since last year; and my thoughts wander there at times - you know the only instance in which Ι have ever thought myself hardly dealt with - it is past - and God grant that among the blessings Ι enjoy, Ι may always number your happiness - you have underrated my regard long enough - Ι only hope you will do it justice, by and by - Be my own fate what it may, Ι shall never cease to watch over yours with affectionate anxiety - Ι do not expect you to tell me you are "quite happy", it would content me for you just to know, that you were really comfortable - God bless you Mary! Always especially & entirely yours A L-'
"At 5 had just written the above & sealed my letter to 'Mrs Lawton Claremont House Leamington Warwickshire' & left it for the post tonight and off at 5:20 & at Lidgate in 25 minutes - dinner at 6 - tea at 7:50 - long talk - she will employ Mr Gey in York to make her will - meant to leave [to?] me and Captain Sutherland['s] executors and secure all to the children. She seems quite decided to name[?][45] me and leave me all for my life and Ι said then Ι would do ditto" (7-Jan-1834).

"Goodish touching and pressing last night, she much and long on the amoroso and Ι had as much kiss as possible with drawers on - rainy night & morning - no stirring out... dinner at 5 ¾ - tea at 8 - talk - prayers at 10 - came upstairs at 10 ½... Miss W- complained of weariness tho' not having been out today - she seemed lowish in fact the day had passed without excitement and in bed she was getting a little into the old way: despairing of being quite well, felt so oddly afraid of not caring for anybody, dislikes the Sutherland's way yet has a feeling of not being able to manage for herself. 'Oh, oh!,' thought I, Ι will get off as well, as Ι can never make anything of her and why all this pother for nothing? However she was on the amoroso as usual and lay upon me and Ι ha[n]dled and grubbled till Ι was heartily tired" (8-Jan-1834).

"Out at 12 - walked with Miss W- to call on Mrs William Priestley - out - then left her (Miss W-) at the gate at Cliffhill... home at 1 - my aunt poorly... wrote the last 4 lines of Tuesday & the whole of yesterday & so far today till 3 ¾ - Ι wish Ι was well off again - Ι can make nothing of Miss W and wish myself out of the scrape. Ι am sick of the whole thing and almost begin to think Ι shall neve[r] live much at Shibden" (9-Jan-1834).

"She said Ι d[id] it right (that is felt and grubbled) last night; she was rather low before this" (10-Jan-1834).

"No touching and grubbling last night and she snored so loud Ι could not sleep. 'Why should be so annoyed?', said Ι to myself and resolved to get rid of her as ssoon[sic] as Ι could and lay awake planning it - fine sunny morning - breakfast at 10 having waited ¾ hour for Miss W-... talked about my being obliged to be at Shibden and fixed to take her to York on Monday & be back on Wednesday" (11-Jan-1834).

"A little goodish grubbling last night that she was tolerably satisfied and did not snore but she had fallen after Ι left and had her back rubbed with essence of turpentine tonight which was anything but agreeable". The preparations for the trip to York are made with letters to the Black Swan and Dr Belcombe: "wrote to Mrs Judd 'Miss Lister expects to be in York about 7 or 8 tomorrow evening, etc., etc.' ordering the same room Ι had with Ι.N. - & saying Ι should only stay a couple of nights... and wrote as follows to 'My dear Steph, As our last conversation is too recent for you to have forgotten it, it is merely necessary to say, Ι hope to be at the Black Swan about 7 or 8 tomorrow evening, & do pray come, if you can, en médécinas a doctor, about nine - Do not announce us to anyone except your wife, as it can be done pro re nataas needed, afterwards - very much yours A L-'... at Lidgate in ½ hour at 6:10 - dined immediately cold mutton & apple dumpling & tea immediately afterwards Miss W- having dined at 1... came upstairs at 10:10" (12-Jan-1834).

After a "goodish grubbling last night" Anne makes her daily visit to Shibden to oversee the work being done on the Hall, she, Ann, Eugenie and Thomas "got off from Lidgate at 2:35 - at Leeds at 7 ¾... alighted at the Black Swan, York at 8:55... tea at 9 ¼ just as Dr Belcombe came & staid about ½ hour - Cotton[46] dangerously ill, but Steph had not made known the danger - "got out of Miss W that she had given the Sutherlands a thousand pounds last June - Ι excl[a]imed against it - she owned she seemed to have got little thanks and will not do it again... Mrs[sic]she means "Miss" W makes no complaints of fatigue and seems as well as usual - saw Steph first and explained a little" (13-Jan-1834).

In York Anne is arranging a place for Ann to stay while she's under Dr Belcombe's care: "At 10 when having waited ¼ hour Dr Belcombe came, walked with to the end of Blake Street & met the cab that ought to have come at 9 ¾ - drove to Mr Bewly's out of Monk Bar to look at the lodgings[47] - good homely property - sufficently satisfied with them... Miss Walker well enough with the rooms & people - terms 2 guineas a week" (14-Jan-1834).

On Wednesday the 15th., instead of heading back to Halifax as Anne had previously intimated, she, Ann & the servants head off on a short tour of East Yorkshire, and, although it's not really relevant to episode eight, Ι'm including here because 1) it interests me, & 2) Ι think we can see how Anne & Ann's relationship is developing.

"Longish, goodish grubbling last night - packing carriage seat box - very biliously inclined - could scarce see before breakfast - breakfast at 11 ¼ - sat talking - left Miss W - & at 12 went to Mrs Henry Belcombe - just called to inquire after old Mr Belcombe... off from the Black Swan York at 2 ¾ & alighted at Hawdon's hotel[48] Selby at 4:40 - poor gravy soup, bad beefsteak, & roast fowl & indifferent plain boiled pudding - had in the master of the house (Mr Hawdon)... came upstairs at 9:25 - fine soft day, F54° at 10 ¼ p.m. (no fire)" (15-Jan-1834).

"Very good grubble last night - she said better done at last than ever it was before - fine morning - breakfast at 8 ½ - we & Eugenie off to see the church at 9 ¼ - ½ hour there - very handsome old abbey church... off from Selby at 10:10 - perfectly flat but well-farmed country - several neat villages - Carleton, Snaith, CawickCowick, RocliffeRawcliffe and ArmynAirmyn... at 12:25 stop to change horses at Booth ferry[49], a largish good Inn, with well stocked larder and where we should have been apparently much better off than at Selby - at Goole in about ¼ hour at 12:50. 35 minutes ther walking thro' the good corn & wooll[sic] etc. warehouses & walking round the large basin well filled with craft, 1 or 2 largish Hull brigs apparently very sea-worthy - the Aire & Calder fine canal[50] runs into the basin at one end which communicates with the Ouse at the other - between the basin & the canal is a good bridge leading to Old Goole a small village about ¼ mile off - Goole very flourish[ing] brick-built place - some very good-looking houses - back at the Ferry house in 17 minutes - waited 10 minutes for the servants eating - embark our carriage & over the water in 5 minutes, but the whole business of em & dis embarking took 19 minutes... off again for N. CaveNorth Cave at 2:10 - stopt at 2:27 20 minutes to see the Howden Church[51] of which the choir, chancel, & chapter here now form a fine ruin, the nave being fitted up as the present church - full of monuments with long-winded rigmarole epitaphs... Howden a neat enough cobble stone paved town - still dead flat - at 3 ¾ in 25 minues, dined in the carriage, cold fowl & the remains of our Lidgate tongue - at N. Cave at 4 - neat enough small village-like market town - pass Cave Castle (Henry Barnard esq.) - the last time Ι passed this noticed the Lodge - on entering from the road left, square tower - right small thin, tall round tower - battlements passing over the gateway between the towers[52] - Ellerker pretty village - Welton very neat pretty ditto - just light enough to see murkily tho' it - could just distinguish the Humber afterwards... Alight at the Cross Keys,[53] Market Place, Hull (now the best Inn) at 6 ½ - tea at 7 ½... came to my room at 11 ¼ F55° at 11 ¾ p.m. - cut nails" (16-Jan-1834).

"Good grubble last night - she snored - Ι count days and hours to getting rid of her - halp[sic] hour asleep on the pot this morning then dressed and ready at 8 ½... breakfast at 8 ¾... out with Miss W- & Eugenie & our guide Mr George Howe at 10 ¾ having put on an old moiré dress & made myself fit for the rain & dirty streets - walked round the 3 fine docks, Humber dock, Junction (or middle) dock, & Old dock,[54] then to the citadel... walked thro' the barrack yard, a fine open space - the broad foss full of water - this & the circumvallation very neat & well kept... then to the Botanic Garden[55] - a little way out of town on the Anlaby Road - there at 12:40 - 5 acres - established 20 years ago, yet nothing very rare or worth in the gardens... about ½ hour there - returned by Albion Street - saw the new addembly rooms & museum... not quite finished... opposite the end of the building is the new public dissecting room in the Egyptian style... the people much against it - will perhaps pull it down - a woman buried the other day at Leven was taken up at 12 at night - a man saw 2 men steal the body - to be tried at York... walked to the South Humber bank Bellevue Terrace[56] - nice neat houses overlooking the river - home at 4 ¾ dismissed our guide, & poked about in shops near home till 5:20 - Dinner at 5 ½... meant to have gone to the theatre tonight, but too idle - my cousin came gently about noon or before this morning - took no notice till night and then put on one white worsted stocking to be soft and keep all safe - went to the Steam packet office - the Transit, 160 horse power, & Monarch 140 ditto ditto will start probably Friday 22 February & run every Friday from here to Hamburg in from 56 to 60 hours... saw several fine whalers in dock this morning of 500 tons burden - distinguished by kneesbracing packed with iron round the lower part of the stem to cut thro' the ice - came home late this yearlast year? - the last in harbour with 36 whales - go out in February... tea at 9 ½ - talk... went to my room at 11:35" (17-Jan-1834).

"No grubbling last night - Ι with my cousin glad to be quiet and she therefore went quickly to sleep and snored a little... breakfast at 8:25 - Miss W- & Ι out at 10:50 by ourselves & did not come in till 5 ½ - shopping... Soon after 12 went to Wilson's 49 Lowgate bookseller, late editor of the Hull Advertiser (tory) later sold it & the politics now quite changed - 2 radical members now... staid a long while reading then went upstairs among his secondhand books & staid till 5!... went into Kidd's 52 Market Place, the shop for flannels, patterns & worsted work etc. - Mrs Kidd gave me the follwing advice for washing flannel: "Flannel should be washed in 2 clean lathers - wring out of one & put it into the other directly - as hot as your hands can bear it - wring gently - shake it well - and hang it up immediately" at a good distance from the fire - dinner at 5 ¾... Mr Wilson the bookseller came with his books & staid some time - Hull very low - tho' never knew such a good fishing season as the last (all the ships well fished) but the oil so low (£15 a ton - 1 good fishwhale provides about 20 tons) & the wear & tear of shipping so great the owners will gain very little - the discovery expeditions[57] failed of their object, but have done much good to the whale fishery, having pointed out the present track in Davis' Straits where all the whales now go - the Baltic trade bad and tho' a good trade to the Mediterranean 30 years ago, none there now... sat up talking & cutting open books till 11:50" (18-Jan-1834).

"Long and to her excellent grubbling last night" (19-Jan-1834). It's Sunday so church, reading and a visit to "the Miss Bedingfields".

"Very good long grubbling last night - Miss W & Ι out at 11 - shopping & sauntering about - home about 2 for ½ - then out again - chiefly with Miss W- at Kidd's - Miss W bought dressing box for ten pounds - useful - not silver bottle tops etc. and vulgarish? as she is herself - this and lowness. How much better shall Ι be without her! and yet Ι talk as if she had only to take me or not as she chose - off from Kidd's shop in the market place at 5:20... at the Tiger Inn Beverley (10 miles) at 6:40" (20-Jan-1834).

"Very good grubble last night - breakfast at 9 ¼ - out at 10 ¼ - we went to the minster - very neat & well kept & beautiful church - Miss W- went with me to the top (near 400 steps or more?) without the least complaint of fatigue... back at the hotel (Tiger Inn) at 12 ½ & off from there at 12:50.. drove thro' Market Weighton without stopping - got out at the Skelfler Gate at 1 ¾ & took Miss W- thro' the plantation & garden & farmyard & then to the house - Walker, father in law of the tenant, came to us in the farmyard & shewed us over the buildings... Ι didn't say who Ι was[58] but talked as if Ι was looking about with some view to purchase the estate and do not think he had an idea of my name... off from Skelfler at 2 ¾ - changed horses at Pocklington new Inn[59] & alighted at the Black Swan, York, at 5:50 - went out shopping - left Miss W- ½ hour at Hick's while Ι went to Dr Belcombe's - 2 woman servants as Lady's maids in view for Miss W-... tea at 9 - took Miss W-'s baggage & off with it to her lodgings (Heworth Grange) at 10:24 & back again in an hour - found I[sabella] N[orcliffe] in the house - went up to her bedroom & sat with her ¼ hour" (21-Jan-1834).

"Long and tolerable grubbling last night - ready at 9:10 - Miss W- up at 6 ½ a.m sheets very wet... Dr Belcombe came - had some private conversation with her - thinks Miss W- quite competent, perfectly so, to make a will... off with Miss W- in a Fly... at Heworth Grange at 4:50 to take possesion of the lodgings - dined with Miss W- at 5 (a mutton chop) & came away at 7:20 promising to see her in the morning - dressed - at Mrs Belcombe's in the Minster Court at 8:00 - Mrs & Miss Belcombe & Louisa [Belcombe] & Mr Bulcock & Mrs Milne - stupid evening - home at 10:55 - Letter (received at Mrs Belcombe's) sent from Dr B- forwarded there from Shibden - from Mariana - 3 pages & ends & 3 pages crossed - had been ill - not in love with Willoughby Crewe tho' she believes Ι think she is and she wonders she is not 'when memory recall what Ι have felt Ι find nothing like it in what Ι do feel' - bids me take time, not fetter myself too soon nor too tightly" (22-Jan-1834).

We're now into the period - not alluded to in Gentleman Jack - where Anne has installed Ann in York lodgings close to Dr Belcombe. Whether this is due to Anne's loving concern for Ann's health, or to ensure that any amendments she makes to her will are legally valid, or both, is a question we'll never have a definitive answer to.

"Breakfast at 9:20 to 10 out at 10:10 to buy gloves... then to Miss Walker - sat talking and eating grapes - then both of us asleep on the sofa - Dr Belcombe came about 2 - meant to have taken Miss W to call on Mrs Henry Belcombe but she was not inclined to stir and we went to her room and she sat on my knee with her head on the bed and her feet on a chair while Ι grubbled her pretty well ... dined with Miss W- at 5 on a mutton chop, & staid with her till 6:10 when took leave, walked home, & came in at 6:20 - very quick - wrote & sent 1 ½ page to my aunt at Shibden to say Ι should be at home between 8 and 9 tomorrow & asked if Eugenie could sleep in the store-room... wrote also note to 'Miss Crompton Micklegate' to say if they would be at home this evening Ι would call for an hour between 8 & 9... dressed at 7 ¼... kind note from Henrietta Crompton - would be glad to see me - there at 8 ½ - tea at 9 - agreeable evening enough - home at 10:40" (23-Jan-1834).

"Cross last night thinking of Mariana as a mistress - Very fine morning F47° & breakfast at 9... out at 10 ½ - called & sat ¾ hour with Mrs Anne & Miss Gage - then at the Duffins' & a few minutes at Mrs Yorkes (did not see Miss Y- not left her room) & at Mrs Willey's & home at 12:40... at Dr B-'s at 2 ¼ - off from there at 3:55, took up the picture frames at Leeds & at Shibden at 10 - did not see my aunt - all well... came upstairs at 11:40... rough journey home" (24-Jan-1834).

Now Anne has to do all she can to get "the tribe" on her side: "To Cliff hill & sat with Miss Walker from 12 ¾ to 2 ¼ - long talk about having left Miss W- (of Lidgate) behind me - her aunt not seeming quite satisfied at first - then about 1 ½ hours at Lidgate looking out things to go to York - home about 4... wrote 3 half sheets full to 'Miss Walker' & sent them at 8 ¼ in a parcel with her letter & some gray silk gown-piece under cover to 'Dr Belcombe York' - Kind letter bidding her to cheer up & think of nothing but the agreeable - mentioned my long visit to her aunt, & long talk about herself, & that Ι had at last Ι thought made it satisfactory - appears she (Miss W- junior) was right to remain where she was under Dr B-'s care - laid down a plan for the daily spending of her time in French: drawing, reading, working & walking - always to be out from 12 to 3 - with my aunt an hour & ½ hour with my father & Marian & came upstairs at 9 ¾" (25-Jan-1834).

"Kind letter from Miss Walker (Heworth Grange York) 1 ¾ pages in French such French as Ι never read before but Ι contrived to make out her meaning. She begs me to send it back corrected but that is quite impossible without changing every word. Poor girl, was she in better spirits than usual made her write? - Wrote 3 pages to Miss Walker - kind enough, & cheering, and about business of one sort or other... from 7:30 to 8:25 wrote & sent 3 pages & 2 lines of one end to 'Mrs Lawton Claremont House Leamington Warwickshire' - very kind cheering letter - mentioned my little excursion with Miss W- & having left her under Dr Belcombe's care - adding that Ι was not at all more likely than Ι had acknowledged myself in my last letter to tie myself either too soon or too tightly - said Ι was in too great a hurry to venture to say much on one particular subject: Mr Crewe, but saying Ι knew her better perhaps than she imagined and could better calculate her means of happiness and bade her never despair" (27-Jan-1834).

"At Lidgate at 2 and 1:20 minutes there with Sarah getting out and ordering about things to go in a large box to York tomorrow - at Cliff hill from 3 ½ to 5 - Long talk to Miss W- about Miss W- junior, and conviced her, Ι think, that it was right for the poor girl to remain quietly under Br Belcombe's care - hinted pretty strongly at Mr Ainsworth's real character - said he was the last man Miss W ought to marry - that Ι abominated the fellow had had a correspondence to manage for immediately on his wife's death and that had Ι been at home Ι thought he would not have troubled her again but was in Scotland in July and had even committed himself to the Sutherlands. Said Miss W thought of making her will - had asked if Ι would be excutor but Ι had merely said she must remember Ι was likely to be much abroad - said she: 'they would think her not fit to make a will', but Ι assured her to the contrary - had asked [a] doctor who said decidedly 'yes' and Ι had advised her to send for Mr Jonathan Grey and to make the will right (said the way she mentioned to me would annoy the Sutherlands - keep all safe at home - and was the sort of will Ι should make myself) for she might leave an additional life estate by codicil - then explained about the proposal Ι had made last autumn twelve month which Ι had told her of before Ι went abroad and said Miss W had told her sister she never repented refusing it but once and that was always. Ι said Ι d[id] not say much now to Miss W but the case was altered Ι was not like Mr Ainsworth who would be glad to get hold of her whether able to decide for herself or not. We talked over Miss Bentley and how odd it was she should rejoice to Miss W at the prospect of her (Miss W's) marrying him - home in ½ hour at 5 ½" (28-Jan-1834).

Anne spends the next few days at Shibden, managing the estate and overseeing her improvements. She also has a conversation with her sister about property & inheritance: "With my aunt about ¾ hour between 9 & 10 & then ¼ hour with my father & Marian kept me talking till 10:50 - she had made up her mind to get my father to sell Butterworth End[60] fromfor? £1500 - let at £38 - afraid of troubles of repairs & wishing to clear off debt - but she would keep Holt's[61] & Lee Lane[62] - advised her to choose between Market Weighton[63] & here, & sell all at one place or other to clear the rest but not to take ½ measures - she would not part with Skelfler - very well then part with all here - but no good in not waiting till my father's death when she could manage the sale better than now - she has had a hint of having at any [rate?] two - she at first said four - thousands pounds left her. Is it from Mr Robinson? If from Miss Mosey she may wait long enough?" (31-Jan-1834).

"From 8 ¾ to 10 wrote 3 pages & ends (pretty close) to Mrs Norcliffe - thanks for her letter - had near gone over for a day or 2, but had workmen at home & feared at a stand & doing wrong as at afterwards appeared - mentioned having written to I[sabella] N[orcliffe] on Saturday under cover to Dr Belcombe and having left Miss W- under his care - made no mystery of it but to Mrs Duffin - but 'should not talk much about it; as there are certain ladylike derangements of system which it is always well to have cured as quietly as possible'... mentioned having been (Miss W- & I) 4 or 5 days at Hull... note from the Halifax Philosophical Society - next month's meeting on Monday next - papers will be read on combustion" (1-Feb-1834).

"Letter this morning 3 pages & first page ¾ crossed from Miss Walker (Heworth Grange, York) 1 ½ page in French as before - had not quite lost all her fears & doubts but is making the great effort. Liked her visit at the Hemry Belcombe's & likes them all very much - longs to see me again - thinks it longer than all the time in Scotland - talks of coming over for 2 or 3 days on the 8th or 10th if Ι will let her. Letter also 2 ½ pages from Dr Belcombe- very good account 'everything goes as well & as smoothly as Ι could possibly desire' - she had twice spent 2 days with them '& all parties are mutually pleased' - likes the lodgings, the people & her servant & everything - Mr Charles Priestly[64] had called (on the 2nd) 'to say he had received a letter from Mr Edwards of Pyenest begging hime to ask if Miss Walker was under my care, & whereabouts, as she had left home without her servants, & he was in some perturbation about her.... Ι replied that Miss W- was here in lodgings, highly respectable, chosen by herself, & that her wish was to be more completely under my care then she had yet been, & for this purpose had resolved to come to York' - well answered - 'Ι am anxious it should be considered & known that she is entirely her own mistress in every way while here - was Mr Edwards's query a fetch to find out how she came here? If so, it answered[?] not - Ι am in good spirits about her' but however it is not good policy to dream much may be done [in] a little while and Ι shall gain more experience about her - Will write again shortly - Odd enough of Mr Edwards - Miss W- will not be much pleased when hears it - from 7:10 in 35 minutes wrote 3 paged & ends to 'Miss Walker, Heworth Grange, York' & sent it by Thomas at 7:55 - glad to hear she so much liked her visits & all the party in the Minster Yard - the more she saw of them the more she would like them - by all means to come over for 2 or 3 days at the time she named (8th or 10th) would try to meet her at Leeds in her own carriage & taking James... Ι had no hope of surprising her before the 10th - dared not leave so many workmen again - all done in my absence had to be undone" (4-Feb-1834).

"Incurred a cross thinking of Miss Walker - to Cliff hill - sat ½ hour & 5 minutes with Miss Walker till 1:05 - said Ι had heard from her niece yesterday - she talked of coming for 2 or 3 days on the 8th or 10th... Miss W- wished she would come back to stay & all Ι could say did not seem so convincing as before, that Lidgate was not the place for her - Ι mentioned Mr Edwards' odd inquiry - she thought her neice would be annoyed but perhaps she would not know - Yes! said I, Ι shall think it right to tell her - when Ι said Lidgate was not the place for Miss W- and old Miss W- should take her in at Cliff hill, no answer was made - Ι said Ι had nothing to do with the going to York beyond helping Miss W to fulfil her own plan - but if she went abroad with me Ι should think myself quite able to take care of her - 'What [would] she go abroad for? it would be very foolish' - she might alays have someone with her at home - Miss Atkinson - Ι said she did all she could for the A[tkinson?]s but their society did not particularly suit her - Mrs Priestley was at Cliff hill yesterday - probably enough to account for Miss W-'s opinions of this morning - Poor girl! said I, Ι am sorry for her = she wants different management from that she has hitherto had - Ι hope all will turn out well but if you do not keep her up to what she is now doing - if you disapprove you will only unsettle her and it is even now the toss up of a straw which way the thing turns - meaning whether intellect is ssafe[sic] or not - Poor girlindeed! they are all against the only planlikely to answer - Ι shall be much talked of & blamed for all the good Ι have tried to do - Ι shall by and by be scandalised for attempting more - and once off again, perhaps Ι shall not return in a hurry" (5-Feb-1834).

"2 letters from Miss Walker Heworth Grange - opened both, first stmbled upon the one written on Wednesday to say how delighted she was Ι would meet her at Leeds... never dreamed the other was a later plan, did not read it. Ι got home at 11:35... Washington came... told him to tell Miss Walker of Cliff hill about her niece's coming & to give the message to Sarah, then finding the plan altered in the other letter, & in consequence of Mrs Atkinson's severe illness, Miss W- probably going to Huddersfield tomorrow to see her, said there was so much uncertainty Ι would tomorrow let Sarah know what to do" (7-Feb-1834).

"Letter 1 ¾ pages from Miss Walker Heworth Grange, York - Mrs Atkinson rather better & Miss W- persuaded by Dr B- to stay till monday - impatient to see me - a few directions for her man servant - will leave York at 9 ½ a.m... At 11 ¾ off to Lidgate, gave the necessary directions, & then to Cliff hill for ¼ hour - met Mrs Priestley just after Ι had mentioned about Miss W-'s coming & just before Ι went away - very civil to each other - sauntered along my walk & home before 2... dinner at 6 ¾ - wrote & sent at 8:20 2 pages & 2 lines to 'Miss Walker Heworth Grange York', to say glad Mrs Atkinson better - and that Miss W- had put off coming before Monday - wrote in answer 2 pages & 2 lines[65] - easier for her to come to me than Ι to go to her - have not done & shall not have done with workmen for some time to come - glad to see her, etc. etc." (8-Feb-1834).

On Sunday Anne is excited to hear than Ann's back at Lidgate earlier than expected: "Roused up by a note from Miss Walker to say that she had had a [illeg] of her aunt, Mrs Atkinson, had gone direct yesterday to Huddersfield to see her & got home at 11 last night - hoped to see me this morning to breakfast - saw my father for a minute or 2, & off at 8:50 & at Lidgate in 25 minutes - Miss W- not quite dressed - looking & being considerably better than when Ι saw her last - breakfast about 9 ½ sat talking over it - she had had on Friday a long queer rigmarole from Mrs Edwards under cover to Dr Belcombe - read me her answer that Doctor B advised her not sending before she left York and Ι wrote her the copy of a better answer - also of note to Miss Rawson asking her to come tomorrow - then sat talking as if our being together was all but fixed instead of staying with her in York - would excursionize - go to Paris for ten days the end of next month or in April - the boy Miss W- sent over to Huddersfield returned about 5 with note to say Mrs Atkinson perhaps rather better & Miss R- would be delighted to come - walked with Miss W- to almost within light from the Cliff hill windows, & home (by my walk) at 5:50... dinner at 6 ¾ & then coffee in ½ hr - then came upstairs & wrote the above of today - as for Miss W, if it is to be or not Ι am easy about it. We calculated and she said she could afford three-hundred pounds for the Paris trip - she will pay all and Ι will make all answer as well as Ι can, however things may be - Thomas Greenwood came at 7 ¼ - sent off Miss Walker's note to Mrs Edwards having first read it to my aunt and wrote to tell Miss Jenkinson to order horses to Lidgate at 9 a.m. tomorrow for Huddersfield & back instead of 8 a.m. for Leeds... Thomas brought letter after church this morning from Mrs H.S.Belcombe York - very kind proper letter 3 pages & ends - they all like Miss Walker, & she unreserved & to feel at home with them - at Lidgate in 25 minutes at 10:05 - coffee & tea - she had had a fine lecture from her aunt (Miss W) and made me promise never to name her, to tell anything about her again to old Miss W in future - came upstairs at 11:20" (9-Feb-1834).

"She was at first tired and sleepy but by and by roused up and during long grubbling said often we had never done it so well before - Ι was hot to washing-tub wetness and tired before it was half over. We talked and never slept till five - talk of taking her to Paris the end of March she to pay all - can afford three hundred - talked too of taking her to Langton, & this she thought would most satisfy her sister - somehow it often strikes me she hesitates to take me for better and worse but wants to make me a stepping-stone into society. She thought Norcliffe[66] gentlemanly - would she not have him if she could? How it will all end Ι know not. Ι almost wish Ι was well off - Miss W- went off to Huddersfield till 10 ¾ having breakfasted at 9 & writing notes etc. with which Ι helped. No prayers now - no mention of service yesterday, we neither of us hinted at the subject - sauntered thro' my walk - home at 11 ¾... felt tired & heavy & lay down till 2... at Lidgate in ½ hour at 6:35 - Miss Rawson of Gledholt there - agreeable evening - she thinks Miss W- much better - strange reports about her being crazy in Halifax and encouraged by the Miss Atkinsons etc. etc. - coffee & tea at 8 ¾. Came upstairs at 11 ½ - stood talking Ι said in part what Miss R had told me - too bad Miss W now saw what she had to deal [with?] - better make up her mind at once or what could Ι do? She agreed and it was understood that she was to consider herself as having nobody to please and being under no authority but mine, to make her will right directly and on returning from France and on my aunt's death then to add a codicil leaving me a life estate in all she could and Ι would do the same to her. Well then, is it really settled or not? Ι am easy about it and shall prepare for either way - fine day" (10-Feb-1834).

"She said how very well and quietly Ι grubbled her last night - she would have had it a second time but Ι would [not?] saying Ι must take care of her - breakfast at 8 ¾ - Miss W- took Miss R- back to Huddersfield at 10 ¾ & would take leave of Mrs Atkinson who is now expected to recover. Ι very kinfd to Miss R- & she will over to call on me - wishes she could see me every week - Dr Belcombe sent me back under cover my last letter to Miss Walker - thinks her presence here 'may be the means of disabusing the minds of her friends in regards to her sejourFrench: "stay" at York - she is a great favourite in the Minster Yard & Ι hope was in a fair way profiting by the plan chalked out' - just shewed this to Miss W- & read it aloud to Miss R[awson] - who seems quite in favour of Dr B-. Sauntered home by Lower Brea... off to Lidgate at 2 - & there in ½ hour... dinner at 6 ½ - wrote 3 pages of ½ sheet to Dr Belcombe & as much to Mrs H.S.B- for Miss Walker to take tomorrow - said Dr Belcombe was quite right in his answer to Mr Charles Priestley about how & where Miss Walker was... everybody thinks Miss W- looking much better - wrote note also to Myers the carriage-maker to ask how long it would require to paint the carriage - & to tell him to take great care of Miss Walker's carriage if sent to him - Coffee at 9 ½ - looking over things & packing till after 3 tonight the kitchen cupboards etc. Thought I, this may do for once but Ι must get her off it by and by - then reading over Mrs Edwards's letter to her & copy of hers to her - said Ι thought she had been rather hard upon herself - was over and convenient enough so Ι did not grieve much - fine day - Miss W- wanted not to go to bed at all, but Ι thought an hour or 2 would be better than nothing" (11-Feb-1834).

"Long capital grubbling so that little time for sleep - she is to give me a ring and Ι her one in token of our union as confirmed on Monday[67] - breakfast at 9 - Washington came for a little while - Miss W-'s maid not much fit for packing - I did it all - books & papers etc. etc. in abundance and had not done till 2 - then off to Shibden - Miss W- ½ hour with my aunt & a few minutes in my study & off again at 3 ½ - Ι went with her in an hour (her own carriage & man & maid) as far as the King's Head Inn near Bradford[68] - & walked back & came in at 5:50 having sauntered up the fields - dinner at 6 ¼ - coffee & then asleep on the sofa - with my aunt from 8 ¾ to 9 ¾ - then with my father & Marian & sat up talking till 10:50 - affectionate to Miss W and told her Ι should not be long without seeing her - she desired me not to write anything particular - she meant of affection - which Ι promised. Ι certainly feel fond of her now and if Ι was once really near her (no drawers on) and she was pretty well satisfied Ι should be at ease - she has often said she wished to be near myself ...fine day - a hail shower as Ι returned over the hills after leaving Miss W- this evening - F47° now at 11 p.m. - my cousin came gently just after breakfast" (12-Feb-1834).

"Wrote 3 pages & ends to Miss Walker... Kind chit chat to Miss W- say it will not be months before she sees me... James brought me ½ sheet full from Miss Walker - arrived safely at Heworth Grange at 10 ½ p.m. having stopt in Leeds to see Chiffoniers[?] - not much worth - Ι had sent to the P.O. this morning for Mrs Sutherland's letter opened and read it - widely written and i[n] a hurry - Ι think she is rather shy of writing just now - advised Miss W- not to put her servants in mourning on the death of her aunt Atkinson - much the best not to do it... sent John Booth at 9 with my letter (3 pages & ends & under the seal) to 'Miss Walker Lidgate, Halifax'[69]" (13-Feb-1834).

"Two letters for Miss Walker one from her sister & one from old Mrs Sutherland ill written and spelt. Opened both - her sister writes again to say she has changed her mind and would have Miss W put her servants in mourning for Mrs Atkinson - Ι shall say no" (14-Feb-1834).

"A parcel to 'Miss Walker, Heworth Grange, York' - kind letter - bade her write every 3 or 4 days or Ι should not be satisfied - said it seemed an age since Wednesday - said she ought to think of me oftener than she used to do & always with pleasure - sent her the copy of a letter to her uncle, Mr Edwards, to tell him to divide the two hundred pounds he has of hers equally between the three Miss Atkinsons on their mother's death" (15-Feb-1834).

"With my aunt from 8 ¾ to 9:50 - talked of my journey to Paris & taking Miss W- - letter from her 3 pages close & all crossed - names a great many things for me to take with me to York - says very little alluding to our union but yet enough t[o] shew me she thinks of it as fixed... talked to my aunt tonight as if the thing was nearly done but Ι should know better in York - tacitly meaning that Ι should then make her give me a ring and bind herself by a decided promise" (17-Feb-1834).

"Incurred a cross thinking of Miss W last night ...wrote & sent at 8:40 letter 3 pages pretty small & close to 'Miss Walker, Heworth Grange, York' - said Ι should be with her for 2 or 3 days before the ten days end - promised not to take Mrs Bewley by surprise - will do all her commissions & had she given me ten times as many & those ten times as difficult not one would have been a 'bore' - impatient to see her - one object uppermost in my thoughts - she may guess when or what she pleases".

As well as reading her mail, it seems that Anne is now particularty keen to exert her influence over Ann, controlling her finances, staff and behaviour: "For reasons to be explained when we meet, say she had better write on one of the ends in her next letter - compliments and an order to Briggs to pay me a hundred pounds on her account - meaning that will be ready for the journey to London and the other order will be on their bankers in London for going abroad - Ι wonder what she will say to this - still decidly of the opinion she should not put her servants in mourning for Mrs Atkinson & she had better tell James he has conducted himself so well in her service she will keep him for now if he likes but can't keep him ultimately... particularly wish her to go nowhere in public with Mrs Belcombe & to tell her she is to make no new acquaintances - she (Miss W-) knows how particular Ι am - Ι will introduce her myself".

A desperate letter form Mariana: "Letter tonight 3 pages & ends from M- Leamington - particularly affectionate: Freddy, you are more frequently uppermost in my mind than you think, the pleasures of memory still visit me, tho' a cloud as the future bears close upon its heels, if you had continued always near me, it would have been happier for me. Some of the sorrows of my heart too big to withstand the comfort of sympathy; would not then have sown the seeds of a regard which Ι never dreampt of, but which Ι now believe to be, as you said, of more than yesterday's growth. Mr C[rewe] hass[sic] sent 'a black profile shadei.e. a silhouette of himsel[f] and a remarkably pretty drawing of the two boys ssaying[sic] that he believed them to be the most welcome present he could send.' She wishes him happier. - 'Ι hope Steph sends you good accounts of your friend of yours. You say nothing but that you are very busy. This is well, employment cheats us out of many troubles. Said before bless you my Fred, love me always & believe me truly yours, Mariana' - Mary you are surely too late in refusing me - you lost me. No, no, Ι would rather try another. As Ι said to Charlotte, Ι would rather have anyone than Mariana - let her take Mr Crewe. Had she been what she ought to have been to me she could not say what she will have done as she did to him. Ι see she has hope of me yet - Ι trust Ι am already beyond her reach - fine day - F51¾° now at 10:20 p.m. - sat reading over M-'s letter till 10 ¾" (18-Feb-1834).

"A cross thinking of Miss W just before getting up ...off to Cliff hill at 2 ¾ - there in ½ hour sat an hour with Miss Walker - mentioned my intention of going to York some day next week after Monday - perhaps Tuesday - uncertain - then about an hour at Lidgate getting out the things to go to York - walked leisurely home along my walk - dressed in ¼ hour - dinner at 6 ¼ - coffee... with my aunt for about ¾ hour (my father gone to bed) sat talking to Marian till near 11 - reading the Morning Herald till near 12" (19-Feb-1834).

"...out at 4 - Mr Sunderland came soon after - came in with him & saw my aunt's leg dressed - the wound not looking so well as Ι had always seen it before - blackish & rather sloughing, but not alarmingly so - out again till 6 ¼... very benumbed with cold, so stood talking over the fire to my father & Marian about ½ hour - dinner at 7:05 - coffee - Marian came about 7 ½ & staid talking till 9 - then an hour with my aunt - letter tonight 3 pages & first page crossed from Miss Walker, Heworth Grange, York - impatient to see me - the fortnight next Wednesday seems an age - begs Ι will not put off going later than Wednesday - she seems to have been pleased with my 'affectionate letter' - 'do come quickly for Ι am getting dull and Ι want you in a thousand ways' - Ι see she will be fond of me by and by - if she will bind herself so that Ι can have confidence Ι hope and think we shall get on together happily - Came to my study at 10:10... wrote 3 pages and a few lines under the seal to 'Miss Walker Dr Belcombe's York' to go early in the morning - directed to Dr Belcombe's that she may get it tomorrow nighti.e. Saturday instead of Sunday - say Ι shall dine with her on Tuesday at 6 & not to keep dinner waiting - be off from here not later than 11 ½ a.m. but she not to be engaged after 5 - Ι may perhaps arrive not much later than that - nothing can be better than her letter to James - right about the note to Mrs Belcombe & about determining not to go into mourning - say the blackberry sirup[sic] had done my cough a great deal of good - Ι take it last thing at night - 'Is it the sweet juice or the thought of her who gave it that has the healing power? God bless you! Ι feel as if Ι should not disrupt you much in anything - good night - always faithfully & affectionately yours AL-' A very kind letter without one word to commit me. The above passage the most tender" (21-Feb-1834).

"A cross this morning thinking of Miss W" (22-Feb-1834).

"Damp rainy morning, F51° at 9:05 at which hour breakfast and staid talking to Marian & then my father till 10:25. The former seems quite prepared for Miss W-'s being here, makes no objection, on the contrary Ι could bring no one my father would like better... wrote 1 page to M[ariana]... wrote 2 more pages & the ends & finished my letter to M-  Had Washington about 5 ½ for an hour - be brought 3 letters for Miss Walker, one with money for the bank - dinner at 6 ¾ - Cried over my letter to Mariana, my eye[s] red when Ι went down to Washington and the thought of her filled my eyes with tears during dinner. She will of course think the concluding lines a take leave of all love between us."

Anne then copies out her rather long letter to Mariana; the "concluding lines" as follows: "Do not be very long in writing - tho' you tell me you are better in health, Ι am always anxious about you - Ι have always considered your happiness before my own; & no wish of mine has ever been put in competition with what you yourself deemed your welfare - Cheer up, my dearest Mary - if gipsy ever did tell truth, may yours have done so! As Ι told you, Ι have no fault to find in one particular quarter, & no feeling which could be uncomfortable to any of us - Let the veil of charity hide whatever faults there may have been on any side, & let the memory of our by-gone days be but the record of their pleasures - God bless you my dearest Mary! Ever very especially yours, AL-" (23-Feb-1834).

"Cross last night thinking of Miss W... Breakfast at 9 ¾ in ¾ hour with Marian - speak as if all was ssettled[sic] with Miss Walker - at least Marian seems to think it so" (24-Feb-1834).

"Packing... off to York at 10:40 - at Leeds at 1:22, off again in 4 minutes - at Tadcaster at 3:22, off again in 6 minutes - stopt a minute or 2 in passing at Myer's to order the under part of the carriage to be put in thorough order, & to be ready by Monday morning saying Ι would send it back in ½ hour - at Heworth Grange at 4 ¾ - Miss W very pleased to se me - but she looked not quite brilliant about the eye - has she head and heart enough for me? DInner at 6 ¼ in 31 minutes - coffee at 8... she siding and labelling all the tin cannistersarchaic spelling Ι brought her - went to our room at 11 ¾ - her cousin just come the first time this twelvemonth or should have gone to bed without drawers on for the first tim[e] ever with her" (25-Feb-1834).

"Tho' not a thorough grubble, she having a napkin on, yet she had a thorough pressing and sq[u]eezing outside of it and we were both considerably excited ...Mr & Mrs George Fenton called on Miss Walker about 11 ½ and staid about an hour - Mr Fenton having as we afterwards heard having written to Dr Belcombe yesterday evening to say his wife could not sleep till she knew how & where her friend Miss Walker was - She & and[sic] Ι out at 2 - called for ½ hour in the Minster Yard... called at Fisher's to inquire after the Norcliffes - then home & took ½ hour's turn about the Malton Road - dressed - had a Fly to go in, & got to the Henry Belcombe's at 5 ¾ to dine... a few minutes with Dr Belcombe downstairs - told him my intention of taking Miss W to Langton in the morning - he easily entered into my view of the thing... home per Fly[70], at 10 ¾" (26-Feb-1834).

Thursday the 27th is a momentous day: Anne's introducing Ann to her aristocratic friends the Norcliffes, they've slept naked together, and Ann gives Anne a wedding ring. It's also the first time that Anne uses the "sexual activity" marginalia symbol with Ann. The symbol appears evry day until Anne returns to Shibden on the 3rd. "No drawers on last night first time and first attempt to get really near her - did not succeed very well but she seemed tolerably satisfied - Rainy morning - could not have my own carriage & Myers could not get Miss W-'s ready till 12 - breakfast at 9 ¾ - a little French - Ι ½ asleep over it - off to Langton at 12:50 - damp rainy disagreeable day - she was poorly and tired tho' she had got up so well in the morning. Ι saw there was much nervousness about going to Langton but took no notice. Ι asked her to buy[71] the gold wedding ring Ι wore and lent her sixpence to pay me for it. She would not give it me immediately but wore it till we entered the village of Langton and then put it on my left third finger in token of our union which is now understood to be confirmed forever tho' little or nothing was ssaid[sic] - At Langton at 3:05 only Mrs Norcliffe & Charlotte at home - surprised but very glad to see us, & very kind & attentive - C[harlotte] N{orcliffe] had heard of my arrival from Mrs Milne - Mrs N- now dines at 3 that we were sat down to dinner in about ¼ hour - coffee - tea afterwards about 6 ¼ - Miss W- much pleased with Mrs Henry Robinson's blazoning & with Miss Best's[72] drawings - our visit went off very well - all sides sufficiently pleased apparently - came away at 7:20 & home at 9 ¾ - coffee - sat talking till 11 ¾ - Glad we went, the Norcliffes very civil to her - shyness went off and she seemed much pleased with her visit" (27-Feb-1834).

"Tolerably near her last night - she said not quite as well as last night but Ι think we shall do in time. She seems very fond of me - is very proper during the day but very sufficiently on the amoroso at night that Ι am reall[y] or soon shall be satisfied with her and Ι really hope we shall get on very well together - Breakfast at 10 ¼ - read the newspaper - wrote out Wednesday, yesterday & so far of today while Miss W- wrote to Mr Dyson - in spite of the very bad accounts of Mrs Atkinson yesterday no account today, that she is still living - Dr Belcombe for ¼ hour - out at 1:50 to 5 ¼ - left Miss Walker at Dr B-'s while Ι called for ½ hour in the Minster Court - then back to Mrs Henry Belcombe and sat ½ hour - then sauntered about with Miss W- & home at 5 ¼ - dinner at 6 - coffee at 8 ¾ - read the newspaper - came to my room at 11 ½ - very fine day" (28-Feb-1834).

"Three tolerable times of it last night - she wanted to have me quite near to her and we shall manage it by and by - Breakfast at 9:35... very sleepy, & literally asleep ½ hour till 12 - out at 1:50... crossed the river & walked all round the walls to Skeldergate - then all round into Trinity Lane to Nutt[73] the comb maker - ordered tortoise-shell comb to be like the horn one Lady V[ere Cameron] gave me... home at 4 ½ - dressed - dinner at 6 - off at 7:20 in a fly - staid ¼ hour upstairs & 20 minutes downstairs with Dr B- & left Miss W- at the Henry Belcombes & called on Mrs Best - lying on the sofa & could not see me but Ellen came to the door to explain - then to the Duffins to tea - then at the Minster Court Belcombes at 10 for 20 minutes & then back to the Henry Belcombes & home at 11 - sat up eating oranges - came to my room at 12" (1-Mar-1834).

"One tolerable kiss last night - Letter from Mrs Dyson[74] to Miss W announcing the death of Mrs Atkinson between 8 & 9 a.m. yesterday... Ι wrote & sent note to 'Mrs Henry Belcombe Minster Yard' mentioning Mrs Atkinson's death & that Miss Wo & Ι would not therefore go out today, begging Mrs H.S.B- to say all kind & proper for her (Miss W-) & myself to the Minster Court Belcombes, & to take Miss W- by & by to return the yesterday's call of Mrs Milne & the Miss Belcombes... out at 3:20 to 4 ¾ walking with Miss W- on the Malton Road - she wrote to her uncle Thomas[75] and copy from my dictation of what she ought to write to Miss Atkinson about giving her and [her/the?]sisters[76] the two hundred pounds in Mr Edwards' hands - At 10 we began looking over Washington's accounts etc. which kept us till 12 ¾" (2-Mar-1834).

"Two goodish ones last night - said Ι had never felt her so well before - Miss W- up an hour or more before me... Breakfast at 9 ¾ - dawdled over 1 thing or another till 12 ¼ Miss W- writing letter for me to take - still waiting - not off till 1:35 just as Dr Belcombe called fearing his patient might be dull on my leaving her - she had wished to have nobody today - but her wish in vain - Ι met Miss Bagshaw almost at the door. Drove to the Minster Yard & sat 20 minutes with Mrs H.S.B- Miss Belcombe had told her Ι had asked the Minster Court party to call on Miss Walker - tout au contraire - & begged Mrs H.S.B- not to take her too soon & not to advise an intimacy... off finally at 2:10 - asleep or musing all the way - from Tadcaster to Leeds in 1:38 hour (from 3 ½ to 5:08) but Leeds home a terribly tedious 16 miles from 5:13 to 7:40 - my aunt better tonight, but had been poorly ever since my going away - the thought of my return did her good" (3-Mar-1834).

Back at Shibden Anne concentrates on the renovation and improvements, while doing her best to placate Ann's "tribe of relations".

"From 8 ½ to 9 ¾ wrote 3 pages & ends to Miss W- said that as Ι wrote for the eye of Mrs Bagnold[77] more than ordinary caution was required - Miss W had begged me not to write anything particular, not to get ourselves laughed at - Ι believe she is fond of me and however unreserved and on the amoroso at night in bed no allusion to these matters ever escapes her in the day - in fact she is then r[e]ally modest and nicely particular enough - said Mrs H.S.B- had promised to go with her to return her call we had on Saturday & Ι had begged there might be no hurry - to be very civil but not encourage intimacy - had told Mrs H.S.B- Ι had rather Miss W- dined with them en famille than meet people there - only few in York Ι cared about her knowing, & to those Ι would introduce her myself - my aunt had been poorly - thought she might not continue so long as Ι had almost counted on - & perhaps Ι could not have her for long - a few kind allusions in my letter to Miss W- herself but no one else would understand - no address inside, i.e not addressed to my dear --- anything - shocked Ι had forgotten to give the servants anything - should give them 10 shillings... some time talking to Marian who thinks Miss W-'s coming here will never go down with her tribe of relations... at Cliff hill from 12:25 to 1:35 - hardly any mention of Miss W-, only asked if she was soon coming back - merely answered she did not talk of it - Miss Cliffhilli.e. Miss Walker senior said if she was so much better why did she not come home - she should write & tell her to come - Oh! oh! thought I, but said nothing - Ι was determined to stay an hour, but had literally almost nodded several times with sleep, when Mrs William Priestley came in - shook hands - very civil to each other - she never named Miss W-" (4-Mar-1834).

"Breakfast at 9 alone until Marian came in about ¼ hour - stood talking of Miss W- till near 11 - Marian really behaves very well about it - a few minutes with my aunt (she had had a restless night) & out at 11:10... came to my stufy at 1 ½... from 3:40 to 4 wrote 4 pages & 1 page of envelope to Miss Walker - mentioned my calling at Cliff hill - her aunt wrote to tell her to come home - 'Ι shall not annoy myself about it, because Ι am sure you will take it as it ought to be taken, & merely be sorry that some of your friends are not wiser - what would Dr Belcombe say?' - the Priestleys never inquired after her - 'What is on your mind about Lidgate? My opinion is a fixed one; because Ι see, & feel, more & more, that it is right - when have you found yourself wrong in following my advice?' - to come here tomorrow if she likes - and if she comes during the assizes I shall not be one of the grumblers - anxious to hear what her sister says - suspect she is no better satisfied than the rest - 'As things are at present, Ι shall not write to your sister - Perhaps Ι have some right to expect, that her great affection for you might give me claim upon her thanks for all Ι have done for you - Ι have at least helped you in the furtherance of a plan which wants nothing but perseverance; & this alone might deserve some notice from those to whom your welfare is so dear - but tell me you are going on well; & all else will be comparatively indifferent' - it seems an age since having seen her - tired of the words good by[e] - 'Ι ate 2 of the oranges just before getting into bed last night, merely for the pleasure of thinking of you' - the P[riestley]s would not advise her coming here - 'In proportion as opposition will be vain, talk will be greater'... dinner at 6:10 & then coffee in 50 minutes - Eugenie packed the box containing crape[sic] bonnet, worsted, velvet brush & biscuits[?], & my letter 4 pages & 1 page ends & under the seal of envelope to 'Miss Walker' containing printed note from Huddersfield & 4 half crowns in white paper written 'sent by Miss Lister to Mrs Bewley's 2 woman servants, Wednesday 5 March 1834' - sent off the box to go by tonight's mail if taken for 5/- or 6/-5 or 6 shillings or if not by the Highflier" (5-Mar-1834).

"James brought me 3 pages of ½ sheet & the 2 first pages crossed from Miss Walker, Heworth Grange, sent with some orders to Washington forfrom? Mrs Sutherland who is very busy, & quite accounts for her silence - '& seems to speak with evident pleasure of the good account of my health - Ι think all will go well'... dawdled out of doors till rain sent me in at 11 ¾ - wrote the above of today & till 1:25 wrote 3 pages to Miss Walker in answer to her note of this morning... chit chat to Miss W- that anybody might see tho' kindly written - say Ι write to say how pleased Ι am at her sister's having so well accounted for her silence & that Ι hope she will by and by be satisfied in spite of all the rest which will be a great comfort to me - Ι shall not however write to her just now - in better spirits about my aunt & begin 'to think again of what we talked' that is, going to Paris this spring... wrote the ends of my letter & sent it off at 8 ½" (6-Mar-1834).

"Mr Sunderland came between 1 & 2... thinks she [Aunt Anne] may get over the summer... stood talking to Marian an hour till after 7 in the hall - laughed & asked which would suit me best, M- or Miss W-? She thought the latter - would be more convenient and then agreed with me that she would suit me in every respect the best - Ι said Ι would rather take her connections than Mariana's. 'Yes,' ssaid[sic] Marian, 'and so would Ι.' ...Both my father and Marian seem pleased about Miss W. Said Ι thought Ι should be happier with her than Ι should now be with Mrs Lawton, to which Marian seemed to agree without the least surprise. Ι merely added 'but many things happen between the cup and the lip' as if Ι did not feel quite sure of Miss W as yet - dinner at 7 ¼... James brought me from Washington this morning [a] letter & parcel for Miss W - opened the former" (7-Mar-1834).

"Wrote 3 pages more & ½ page envelope & finished my letter to 'Miss Walker, Heworth Grange, York' & sent it off at 9 ½ by Thomas in a parcel with W[ashington]'s letter & the small parcel for Mrs Sutherland to go by tonight's mail - should have sent Washington's letter etc. yesterday but waited to hear from Miss W- this morning - much disappointed - strongly urge her to determine about & give W[ashington] orders to let Lidgate - should always determine as soon as one can, & then the sooner the determination is acted on, the better - a great comfort & advantage to us to have things settled as soon as possible so that our intentions should be clear to all whom they concerned - our position too equivocal - then dated second page this evening - saying it well to make an excuse of Lidgate but the truth was Ι could scarcely believe it was not a week since my return - it seemed an age since Monday & not hearing from her made me dull - did she wish me to think less of her?"

A letter from Ann has crossed Anne's in the post; Ι found Anne's reaction to it quite shocking. It's almost as if she's downgrading their relationship when she starts describing their union as a compact.

"Letter 3 pages & 2 ½ pages crossed from Miss Walker Heworth Grange - much pleased with the bonnet - should not want another - 'You quite astonish me with your expedience[?] in the execution of all my wants & wishes - Ι am thinking about Lidgate & will say more when Ι write next. Will it be wise to irritate or brave public opinion further just now? For the same reason, ought or can Ι accept your kind proposition about Shibden?' - Her usual indecision - does she mean to make a fool of me after all? She would not have me paint the carriage nor do more at Shibden than necessary. Gave me that is bought for sixpence and put on again my ring languidly and now declines taking the straight course of shewing our union, or at least compact, to the world. Should Ι ask her to do what she could not or ought not? Public opinion has been too much or too little braved and whatever force there is aginst her coming here is the same against my going there. Ι don't like all this, Ι distrust her and feel as if the thing would again and this time forever go off between us. Ι shall not be played with, let her come here before Ι go there again, but Ι am on my guard and she may find this won't do - my letters and feelings have been more affectionate than she deserved. She concludes with you will perceive Ι have practised what Ι preached that is not to write anything particular. Ι will take the hint. 'Ι long for the sketch of the chimney piece but don't pay the carriage - why did you do it of the the box? Ι suspect the affront was Thomas's not yours. Affront! Does this sseem[sic] as if she really thought us united in heart and purse? Delighted to hear my aunt is a little better 'not selfishly so for my own wish is that you should never take another distant journey so long as she lives, kind as she is & considerate in desiring it - there are plenty of places nearer home unseen & which it would be disgraceful not to visit' - this would be well enough if Ι did not shrewdly suspect she wishes to avoid going abroad or doing anything that would too decidedly bespeak our compact What will she think of my letter of last night so affectionate and straightforward, perhaps it is lucky it went and it would not have gone had Ι received hers first. Ι shall not write till Ι have heard from her again - let us ssee[sic] how she can shuffle off. It has often struck me she wanted to make a cat's paw of me to get into society - no harm done yet take care of my own concerns. My aunt's death will try the thing and perhaps after all Ι shall be off at a t[a]ngent Ι will be cautious what Ι do in the meantime even in venturing to the plenty of places nearer home unseen. Miss Rawson says her mind is little and much in her money shall I find her right? 'Only think of the time when you can come again to see the onyx (the ring Ι gave her) and ever believe me with love to your aunt and kind regards to your father and sister, yours faithfully and affectionately AW'. She little thinks how much she has annoyed me - but no more of her just now - Rainy day from between 8 & 9 till between 1 & 2 p.m. afterwards pretty fine - but very boisterous windy night" (8-Mar-1834).

The next day is spent sleeping and writing letters to maintain her friendships in Paris and Copenhagen; a letter to Countess de Blücher includes this very touching passage: "My poor aunt suffers a martyrdom & may still survive some months - it was her arms that first held me - hers was like a mother's care, & to her liberal kindness were owed half the comforts of my early life - Ι see her sinking slowly & painfully into the grave; and at such a time, the heart even of a casual observer would not be hardest nor his spirits lightest - Ι shall feel lonely when she is gone - but Ι did all Ι could - my coming made her happy & Ι am satisfied".

Ann doesn't get a mention until the very end of the day's entry: "With my aunt at 9 ½ for ¾ hour - told her Miss W's hesitation about letting Lidgate and coming here and my feeling about it, saying it was touch and go with me. 'Yes,' answered my aunt, 'Ι should not be surprised if it is all off'. 'No, no' said I, '[I] don't quite know that'" (9-Mar-1834).

"Writing little paragraph in answer to Miss W's indecision about Lidgate - Letter 3 pages & ends & first page crossed (forwarded by Dr Belcombe from York) from M- Leamington - very affectionate & very judicious answer to my last - hopes Ι find Miss W- better - 'Is she une malade imaginaireimaginary illness because Steph says in speaking of her to me if Miss Walker was poor she would probably not be sick'" .

Anne then copies some of the rest of Mariana's letter into the journal:
'Had anything passed in reference to the occurences of last spring, & have you any reason to believe an answer on the same subject, if again required, would be different from that which you received last year? Freddy, since you have been in York, my thoughts have been perpetually full of you. Ι do love you dearly and fondly. Come what may, my heart is not unfaithful and still as formerly and for ever my joys by yours are known. What you say on the subject of making things answer is Ι doubt not true as applied to you, because you have energy of character to do with your mind what you will, but not one in a thousand could in reality so bend to circumstances - you are one where practice can be made to accord with the theory, but never the less there is no reason why you, with others, should not profit by the maxim of "look before you leap" - Ι know quite well, yet it would take much more to make you satisfied than you think, for my own feelings have more than once brought the conviction that even now she who occupied the "fairy visions of your youth" would have new lessons to learn. You won't allow it, & Ι know you argue well against it, but your views of domestic life are changed and Ι am quite assured the people & things that could have made you happy some years ago, would not do so now, without the help of your "Ι will make it answer" - yet all, & everything you undertake may answer, will always dearest Fred, be your earnest prayer - God knows what time my bring us both, but my visions for the future do not offer a much brighter prospect than the present presents - As the last 18 years have passed, so do Ι expect will be those to come, & the only comfort Ι have to cling to, is the circumstance that if Ι have few individual pleasures, Ι at least enjoy that of doing good to others. There are many who would have been sadly off without me, & in having done good, Ι can, & do, perpetually find my best consolation. Should anything under existing contretemps deprive me of this solice, life would be altogether a burthenarchaic: burden'
"How one false step in early life may blast the whole remainder of our days! Poor Mary! She has diappointed me too cruelly; but her fate, as it was her own making, is more pitiable than mine - the new lessons she would now have to learn, are, how to regain my confidence - it was in losing this, she lost the all she now regrets - and her affection for me now is the forced tribute of esteem... Dinner at 7 ½ & coffee & read till 8 ½... wrote 3 pages to Miss W- till 11 ½" (11-Mar-1834).

"Sent 3 pages to Miss W- dated yesterday & 4 & envelope & ends dated this morning - counted upon hearing from her yesterday but no letter this morning! 'What on earth is the matter?'... A pity Ι did not did not receive her letter till Thomas's return from taking the parcel on Saturdaytoday is Wednesday".

The first letter is rather severe, to say the least: 'But it (my letter) was, in fact, an answer, by anticipation to the most important part of your last - as Ι wrote by parcel under no fear of Mrs Bagnold, Ι shall quote the passage to which Ι allude for the sake of making present remarks the more clear - "Ι am thinking about Lidgate, & will say more when Ι write next - will it be wise to irritate or brave public opinion further just now? For the same reason, ought, or can Ι accept your kind proposition about Shibden." Ι am not the person to change tomorrow without extraneous[?] cause, the opinion which, on mature deliberation, Ι have fixed today; nor am Ι at all likely to ask you, in one breath, to that, which in another, Ι immediately agree, you neither can, nor ought to do - Ι am still, therefore, convinced as strongly as before, that it would not only be wise, but wisest, for you to do that which Ι have advised - A proper respect to public opinion is due for all; but it is best shewn by paying a proper respect to ouselves; & that is always difficult under circumstances which seem equivocal - you have made up your mind - you therefore have, or ought to have, courage to avow it... Ι now advise you so differently, as Ι have often told you, from what Ι should have done under other circumstances, that you really must let the real reason be acknowledged - think of this when you are thinking of Lidgate - good night'.

The second letter ends on a more conciliatary note: "Good of her to set her face against another long journey as long as my aunt lives - Ι had given up all thoughts of going to Paris so soon as we once intended - 'the distance from here to York is quite another thing - but if you are bent upon persuading me not "to irritate or brave public opinion further just now" Ι have as little chance of going to York as you have of coming to me... Ι have done my best, & have surely succeeded, this time, in practising what you preach (to write nothing that might not be seen) - if Ι failed beyond your patient endurance before, you had better scold than punish me by not writing at all - How fares it with the onyx? Is it constant to its change, or dwells it not & then à la Pelotte?[78] Does it as if the £20 was thought enough?' given to Miss Atkinson 'Do pray write as soon as you can - ever faithfully & affectionately yours AL' - With my aunt at 9 ¼ for about an hour - read the Morning Herald - wrote so far of this page till 11 ½ - very fine day - F58½° now at 11 ½ p.m." (12-Mar-1834).

"Letter from Miss Walker 3 pages & 2 pages crossed - Ι had so indulged her she had fidgetted herself at not hearing from me - sends me copy of her letter to Washington - there is one sentence so much too sharp he will certainly not lay that to me[79] - 'Ι am still in the mire about Lidgate' - all she wrote about on the subject & enough - but, poor girl! Ι am getting over my annoyance - she wants guiding and Ι must begin as Ι mean to go on or give her up at once ...my letter to Miss W- written Tuesday, yesterday & tonight 5 pages & ends + 1 page & ends - wrote tonight: 'Ι impatiently waited your answer about Lidgate - it is couched in less than one line "Ι am still in the mire about Lidgate" - enough - that incubus, indecision, must press on you no more - Had Ι been at your elbow, you would have been wiser - it can't be just yet; therefore, leave the matter in status quo for the present, and advertise house & land together next year'... 'write to me by Saturday's post without fail - Ι shall go on being indulgent; tho' what do you deserver for that sentence quoted a page 2? Ι had some reason to be annoyed; but we soon relent towards those we love - good night! faithfully & affectionately yours AL'" (13-Mar-1834).

"Out at 7:20 & along my walk - at nine in twenty five minutes incurred a cross in the hut thinking of Miss W - breakfast at 9 ¾ with Marian - out at 10 ½... dinner at 7:20... till 12:10 looking over papers" (14-Mar-1834).

"Breakfast at 9:05 - meaning to go to Mr Parker's office but parcel from & letter from Miss Walker Heworth Grange - the tone of her manner of writing affectionate and proper enough as if she really did mean to submit, so said Ι was quite satisfied - the onyx only off her finger at night and to wash hands - Miss W quite satisfied to let Lidgate house & land together next spring - wants me to go to her the end of the month & take her to see Duncombe Park on the 31st - said Ι would do my best, but would say more about it in my next - "Jusqu'aux autels (as far as is right) Ι would do anything in the world to give you pleasure" - Ι need not write beforehand unless quite convenient for to remember Ι was going to my own lodging. The writing by parcel made her write at ease from fear of Mrs Bagnold ... dinner at 7:20 - read last night's paper. Ι called at the postoffice this morning to inquire why my paper had not come the last 2 nights but been sent [in] the morning - and Mrs Bagnold's son blamed the clerk & said he should take better care in future" (15-Mar-1834).

"Incurred a cross just before getting up thinking of Miss W - breakfast at 9 ¼ with Marian... from 10 ½ to 12 ¼ in my walk - delightful morning... my aunt poorly - saw her leg dressed - Ι think the sore rather larger... Mr Sunderland came about 4 p.m. - told me the wound was certainly rather larger but my aunt's pulse very favourable... with my aunt from 9:35 to 10:35 - read the Morning Herald partly aloud to her" (16-Mar-1834).

"Out at 12 ½ - leisurely along my walk to Cliff hill - there from 1 ¼ to 2:20 - Mr William Priestley there 10 minutes or ¼ hour, & Mrs W.P- there all the while & staid me out - Miss W- reproached me for not having told her & her neice that Mr & Mrs George Fenton had called! & wanted to know if she (Miss W- junior) would remain in York during the assizes when she would not stay the one night (16 January) of the ball - on Miss Cliffhill's telling me the story of Dr Belcombe's telling his intimate acquaintance Mr George Fenton that Miss Lidgate would be quite well in a few weeks (supressing my surprise) Mrs Priestley did say she was glad to hear Miss Walker was so much better, & on my asking if she had anything to send to York - No! not till she saw her - but she should be glad to see her at home again - just called at Lidgate in returning to get the key to put Miss W-'s velvet bonnet back in the drawer - & home about 3 ½... dinner at 6:20... finished & sent at 8 ½ my letter to 'Miss Walker, Heworth Grange, York'... mentioned some of the particulars of my call this morning at Cliff Hill - think the William Priestleys will call opon her perhaps during the assizes - there is an appearance of jealousy, that as things are [at] most make me uncomfortable - Ι feel a little impatient tho' it does not appear as yet - if Ι cared for her less the case would be very different - she must really follow my advice, must consider fairly what is now the real line of duty" (17-Mar-1834).

"From 9 ¼ to 11 ¾ wrote 4 ¾ pages to Miss Walker... kind letter... nothing particular - concluded with 'Ι have many things to say - my heart is full of them; but imagine all you can, & believe me now & always faithfully & affectionately yours AL' - said my aunt was not quite so well these last few days, but rather better last light - had not heard of her this morning - if not worse hoped to dine with Miss W- next Saturday week - not to expect me much before 6 - could not leave here before 11 & wished to look at firegrates in Leeds" (20-Mar-1834).

"Dinner at 6 ¾ - coffee - [illeg] musing till 8 ¼ - then looking over Gibbon for his account of the monophysite heresy... Miss W- asks the meaning of the term - letter 3 pages & ends from her this morning - had had pain in her breast & back of her neck but tolerable account of herself - & satisfactory letter - with my aunt from 9:50 to 18 ¾ - M-'s sister Mrs MillerMariana's sister Eliza brought to bed on Tuesday of a stillborn daughter - read the Morning Herald" (21-Mar-1834).

"Sent 5 pages & ends to 'Miss Walker'... kind letter but the kindness is more in the quiet confidential manner of writing than anything else and might be seen by all the world, except tell her never to look even half cross at me, and be it only quiet and gentle she will have more of her way and Ι less of mine than anybody but herself would believe - said Ι had written as Ι told her to Mrs L[awton] but - - - had not sent the letter which should now be rather modified - that is will not tell Mariana that Miss W and Ι are positively engaged and advise Miss W not to name it as she asks my leave to do to Steph - say he had better hear it from Mariana than from Miss W or me" (22-Mar-1834).

"Wrote 3 pages & ends, small & close to M- an altered edition of my letter written on Tuesday in substance that Ι had more common sense than to sacrifice my happiness to the pomps and vanities of the world - the letter is breathtaking:
'Time kissed another hand, not mine to tear away the fairy visions of my youth, persons & things had disappointed me too cruelly; & the stay my heart had fondly leaned on twenty years, was torn away, ere she, whom Ι had doted on so long, had new "lessons to learn" to make me happy - Ι awakened as from a dream, the day of life far spent, & the structure of happiness to begin anew - at first Ι could scarce persuade myself the change was real; & my heart fainted beneath the burden of its sorrow - but vigourous effort, aided by the best belief that Providence makes all things work together for good, enabled me to reason more & more calmly; the bitterness of feeling passed away; and, as Ι told you at Leamington, Ι only hoped that, in common charity, you would never from thoughtlessness, or ignorance, or another cause whatever, inflict again such a desolating disappointment - you can't possibly doubt my regard, my deeply heartfelt interest in your welfare - Ι am, at least, your friend, a trie, & steady one; and my feelings overcome me as Ι earnestly entreat you to remember, that the bane of happiness is want of confidence - would the new lesson be an easy one, to teach me how to trust again? But you are whose faith is still unshaken - your way is, therefore, smooth & easy - go on in it cheerfully - enjoy, as you deserve to do, the nameless pleasure of doing good, & hope, and believe with me, that we may still live to see each other happy - you know the pain it would give me to do anything you had reason to disapprove or dislike;but, if you see me as happy as Ι myself aspire to be, Ι am sure you will rejoice, & be satisfied - the prospect is as fair as such prospects are in general - but Ι shall be able to give you a more distinct answer, by and by' ..."conclude with 'God bless you my dearest Mary, ever very especially yours AL'" - followed by the enigmatic "this letter and the last left out the entirely" (23-Mar-1834).

"Letter nearly 3 widely written pages from Mrs Sutherland (Udale House) to inquire after Miss Walker, as she knew Ι had been lately with her - grateful for my kindness to her etc. etc. - had heard tho' not from Miss W- of Mr Edwards's interference - 'he could do no good, & was sure to give offence - he might have felt assured that we should take every prudent precaution in regard to Ann - however Dr Belcombe judged most wisely in not replying to the questions put'" (25-Mar-1834).

"Incurred a cross just before getting up thinking of Miss W - Breakfast from 9 ½ to 10 ¾ with Marian... out at 11 ¼ - went to Lidgate to give Sarah 1 or 2 commissions - Washington going to York on Friday so to take all the things... dinner at 6 ¼ - Marian came to ask me about tin box for papers & staid talking till 7:40 - she is coming quite round to think of and attend to what Ι say - perhaps by and by Ι may have as much influence over her as anybody else - Letter tonight from Miss Walker (Heworth Grange, York) - 3 pages the 2 first pages crossed - a few more commissions... the pain in her chest better - 'your coming will dissipate it altogether' - reading the Morning Herald till 11:40" (26-Mar-1834).

"Breakfast at 11 ½ with my father & Marian... off from Shibden at 12:35 - at Leeds by Wibsey in 2 hours - from L[eeds] to Tadcaster in 1:37 hours - & from T[adcaster] to Heworth Grange in 1:08 - here at 5:18 - Miss W very glad to see me - dinner at 6 ¼ - coffee at 8 ½ - talked & came to my room at 10:35 - wild, windy, snow-and-hail-showery day till fine-ish from Tadcaster & for the rest of the evening" (29-Mar-1834).

Finally the diary catches up with Gentleman Jack; it's GJ day 72 and, according to the script, spring 1833. The actual Big Day, which turns out to be a very low-key affair, happens on Easter Sunday, 1834. As they approach the church in Anne's carriage we see the exchange of rings - we know that this had in fact already happened, and Ι'm not 100% sure that Anne saw this as quite the momentous event that the orthodox Anne Lister story presents. This is the entire diary entry for the day:

"Three kisses better to her than to me - Very fine morning - F49° at 8 ½ a.m. - breakfast at 8 ½ - at Goodramgate Church at 10:35 - Miss W- & Ι & Thomas staid the sacrement - almost all the congregation staid & tho' the church too small to hold many the service took 40 minutes - the first [t]ime Ι ever joined Miss W in my prayers Ι had praye[d] that our union might be happy - she had not thought of doing as much for me - called for a minute or 2 in the Minster Yard to say we would dine there at 5 ½ - declined going to hear the fine anthem (at 4) in the Minster - walked to the village of Heworth & by the Stockton road back in an hour - & at Monk-bar church at 2 ½ - the clergyman preached (25 minutes) who read the prayers in the morning - Ι asleep and knew nothing of the sermon now or in the morning - sat talking - dressed - off to Dr Belcombe's at 5 ¼ - nobody but ourselves - dinner about 5 ½ - coffee tea - home at 10 ½ - sat talking till 12 ½ tonight - very fine day - then a complete non sequitur[80] - Mr W. Crewe had thought about & recommended getting Hamlyn Milne[81] out to Australia under the company[?] of that settlement" (30-Mar-1834).

All the scenes, both external and internal (everything inside the church-yard gate) were filmed at the actual church, the astonishingly beautiful Holy Trinity in Goodramgate. The building is almost entirely unchanged from how Anne and Ann would have known it. We don't know which of the 17th-century box pews they sat in, but the GJ location is easy to find (two rows back from the pulpit). The arrival and the final "are you still talking?" scenes were filmed in Precentor's Court, the other side of the Minster - although the green gates that they go through before and after the service don't actually exist, and were presumably built - or created in CG? - just for the two brief shots. The faux gates are a remarkably close copy of the real gates, but are in better condition (matching the buildings around them). The actual gates open straight into the busy shopping street that is Goodramgate, which would have been impossible to dress as it was in the 1830s.

The other wedding - Thomas and Suzannah's, which is happening at the same time - was filmed at All Saints Church in Weston, North Yorkshire.

And that's it, a very satifactory end to the series. Of course we know it's not the end of the story... what does series 2 - COVID-19 permitting - have in store for us? Will it take up from where series 1 left off? Will Thomas Sowden pay for his patricide?

Just for completeness, here's Anne's account of the wedding night & her first day of married life:

"One longish one last night and then slept quietly - Very fine morning F50° at 8 ¼ a.m. - breakfast at 9 ¾ in ¾ hour - out at 11 to the Register Office for servants Mrs Williamson's [illeg] to inquire for man servant - then Miss W- paid for silver forks at Cattle & Barber's - met Mrs Willy & her daughter Mrs Little & promised to call if Ι could - the latter looking very well - home soon after 12 - Miss W- had her drawing master from about 12 ½ to 2 teaching her perspective - staid during the whole lesson which prevented my making any calls - from 3:20 to 5:20 Miss W- & Ι walked on the Stockton road as [far?] as the Brockton lodge (Mr Agar's) - dressed - dinner at 6 - dessert - coffee at 8 ¾ - wrote out journal of Saturday yesterday & today while Miss W- was writing out music - very fine day" (31-Mar-1834).


"And so we leave them to it."


< Episode 7


Notes & Observations
[1] The de la Terrasse was at 50 Rue de Rivoli, but the buildings have been renumbered since (Hotel Meurice, currently at number 228, was then at number 42).
[2] Mrs Barlow had been Anne's lover during her stay in Paris over the winter of 1824/5.
[3] This is possibly Anna Debourg (from Italian sources), who had a companion named "Sofia O'Farrell" in the 1830s.
[4] At least Ι think it's her cousin - the Dr Lister to whom Anne eventually leaves Shibden.
[5] No suggestion of any hanky-panky. Alas.
[6] Misprinted as "47 years older" in Anne Choma's Gentleman Jack - The Real Anne Lister.
[7] In GJ Annes tells Aunt Anne in a letter that she slept in her greatcoat at Marburg "as the bed was damp" - in fact the beds were damp at both Marburg & Kassel, and it was at Kassel where she "slept in my greatcoat etc. had a good night".
[8] They're both wrong, it's calèche.
[9] Ι can't find "Saltzb(o)urg" on Google Maps, but there is a castle - die Heldenburg - at Salzderhelden just outside Einbeck. The river is the Rhume at Northeim, the Leine at Salzderhelden.
[10] The river at Niendorf is actually the Weser.
[11] It seems that Anne uses the word "postilion" to refer to the driver, so the episode 7 script is probably accurate.
[12] French: "too much".
[13] French: "embarrassed".
[14] German: "steamship".
[15] Probably a room with two beds.
[16] Ι believe the countess to be the recently-widowed Fanny Sophie von Schimmelmann (neé von Blücher) who was the sister of Sophie's brother-in-law (Sophie's sister Emily was married to Fanny's brother, Gustav Carl Frederik von Blücher - they were the Copenhagen "Bluchers" of the diary). Fanny's husband, Count Joseph Friedrich Carl Lensgreve von Schimmelmann, had died aged 45 on 6 January that year (1833). Fanny herself was to die two years later, aged 37. The von Schimmelmanns were of German descent who had acquired Danish nationality and the Ahrensburg estate in the 18th century. The family had been very influential in the Danish court.
[17] Manone "Marie" Barbara Blücher (neé D'Abbestée) 1770-1852.
[18] Ι.e. Travelling by boat rather than by road.
[19] Not sure where Sophie has gone.
[20] Anne seems to have arrived at the inn 15 minutes before her fist sight of the town.
[21] A Madame Hage.
[22] Ι don't know who this is a reference to.
[23] Peter Brown, a British diplomat.
[24] Niels Rosenkrantz, 1757-1824.
[25] Princess Varvara Alexandrovna Vyazemskaya - no wonder Anne left her diary blank. 1774-1849.
[26] Madame Rosenkrantz's half Italian, half Danish - and no doubt pretty - niece.
[27] Anne was learning German while in Copenhagen.
[28] A coupé is a small carriage, so would have been cramped.
[29] Probably Fanny Marie Blücher, who would have been four at the time.
[30] Anne's German language teacher.
[31] Lord Hillsborough was a British diplomatic courier "who was returning from Norway with dispatches" and accompanied Anne to Hamburg.
[32] The ferry crossing was replaced by a bridge linking the islands of Zealand and Funen in 1998.
[33] The "Little Belt", the strait between Funen and the mainland.
[34] The Columbine was a paddle steamer built in 1826 and operated by the General Steam Navigation Co. until 1855, when it became "stranded at Rotterdam".
[35] A shortened Water Lane still exists, but the Ship Tavern is sadly gone - it's believed to have been located where Byward Street now runs.
[36] The voyage from Hamburg actaully only took eight days - Anne had time to wash and change while waiting for the Columbine in Hamburg.
[37] Gentleman Jack - The Real Anne Lister
[38] Lady Vere Cameron - no idea why she was in Leamington.
[39] Did the Atkinsons (Ann's uncle Law and niece Elizabeth) go to collect Ann from Scotland, rather that the Priestleys?
[40] Charlotte Norcliffe, Isabella's younger sister.
[41] Ι have no idea who this "Phillips" was or what this might mean.
[42] Mariana's married sister Henrietta.
[43] Presumably the "Miss Walker returned to Lidgate" line.
[44] This is the first mention that Ι have found of Anne having a "kiss" (orgasm) with Ann. As she didn't quite make it due to the fact that she wasn't naked, Ι surmise that Anne's orgasms were achueived by direct genital contact.
[45] The code here is a bit garbled.
[46] John Cotton William Belcombe, Steph Belcombe's eldest son. He died aged 27 in Madras while serving with the East India Company on 12 January 1845.
[47] Anne later identifies the lodgings as being at "Heworth Grange", which is marked on an 1856 OS map but sadly no longer exists. Number 45 Heworth Green, built in 1861 and formerly also known as Heworth Grange, occupies part of the site of the original house & grounds. It's about ¾ of a mile from Minster Yard.
[48] Ι think that this is now known as "The George Inn"; it was being run by a Tommy Hawdon in 1834.
[49] Ι can't identify the inn, but there is a Boothferry bridge and a Ferry Lane at Airmyn.
[50] Anne may have been mistaken: nowadays, at least, it's the Knottingley and Goole Canal.
[51] Howden Minster - still very much as Anne describes it.
[52] Cave "Castle" was built early in the 19th. century and rebuilt in the 1870s; Anne's description more-or-less matches the current gatehouse.
[53] The Cross Keys Hotel closed in 1922 and the building was demolished in the 1970s due to "town planning" vandalism.
[54] "Old Dock" was renamed "Queens Dock" & "Junction Dock" "Princes Dock" in honour of Queen Victoria and Prince Albert after a royal visit in 1855; Queens Dock was later filled in & became Queens Gardens.
[55] Hull Botanical Gardens were established in 1812, moved in 1877 and closed in 1889.
[56] Now lost to redevelopment.
[57] Possibly the expeditions searching for the Northwest Passage.
[58] The Skelfler estate was owned by the Listers; Anne had lived there as a child. Her mother was buried in Market Weighton.
[59] The Pocklington New Inn is now the Yorkway Motel.
[60] A house on the Shibden estate. It may be the cottage known as "Butterworth End Farm" on Butterworth End Lane, Norland.
[61] Possibly Holt's (coal) Pit.
[62] There is a Lee Lane north of Shibden - the Listers possibly owned a house there.
[63] The Skelfler estate.
[64] Ι think this must be William Priestley's brother; i.e. another of Ann's first cousins.
[65] Anne is repeating herself and, Ι think, mixing up her & Ann's letters.
[66] Norcliffe Norcliffe, Isabella Norcliffe's brother, who Ann had met in York.
[67] On Monday Anne wrote: "Well then, is it really settled or not? Ι am easy about it and shall prepare for either way"...
[68] There was a "Kings Head", a former coaching inn, on the Halifax to Bradford turnpike about five miles from Shibden. It closed as a pub in 2009; in 2007 the publican was murdered in the car park. The building now houses a children's nursery.
[69] Strange - Ann is currently in York.
[70] In episode 2 Mr Rawson says he sent his "gig" back to the manufacturer "per canal".
[71] Anne makes a mistake with this word, encoding it as "but". Anne Choma, in Gentleman Jack - The Real Anne Lister, transcribes it as "cut" - but the later "sixpence to pay for it" makes "buy" much more likely.
[72] Probably the artist Mary Ellen Best - the daughter of Isabella Norclffe's sister Mary.
[73] John Nutt & Son, 87 Trinity Lane (in 1840).
[74] Harriet Dyson, née Edwards, Ann's aunt.
[75] Thomas Edwards, Ann's mother's brother.
[76] My best guess is that Miss Atkinson was Elizabeth (1800-1875); the sisters Charlotte (1803-1862) & Lucy (1805-1889). Their father, Law Atkinson (1759-1835), had married Ann's aunt, Elizabeth Edwards (who has just died), in 1794.
[77] Mrs Bagnold was the Halifax postmistress: she would have been able to read letters passing through her hands.
[78] Ι have no idea what this means.
[79] i.e. Washington, who wants to rent Lidgate from Ann, won't blame Anne for the indecision.
[80] Presumably Anne had heard this at dinner with the Belcombes that evening.
[81] Mrs Milne's son, Constantine Hamlyn Milne (b.1816).
Page updated 15-May-2020